Page 60 of Tell Me Everything
“Of course, I want to know.”
“Then why aren’t you asking?”
“Because you have to decide if you want me to know.”
I knew all too well what it was like to carry wounds from your past, and how difficult it was to talk about them. Often, the pain we feel can be suffocating, and the mere idea of having to say out loud what's destroying us seems unbearable. I couldn't push Alex.
Alex knew what was going on in my life; he'd been in the wrong place at the wrong time. If things hadn't gone the way they did, I'm not sure I would’ve ever told him. It was too hard. Alex put his hand on my thigh.
“I want you to know.”
“Okay.” My pulse quickened. I'd been trying to find out what had happened to him for months, but now that I'd seen his pain, I wasn't so sure anymore.
At his house, we passed Audrey and their mother. I barely had time to greet them before Alex dragged me to his room.
“Gosh, you must really want to spend time alone with me,” I quipped as I entered his room.
“So? You got a problem with that?” Alex raised a mocking eyebrow. Every trace of tension in him seemed to have disappeared.
It was a delusion, so I pretended nothing had happened. “Nope, not at all.”
Without warning, Alex placed a quick kiss on my lips. Before I could kiss him back, he was already backing away. “You can't say no today.”
A part of me wanted to protest, but seeing his playful, childlike expression, I smiled like an idiot despite myself. After all, I was his girlfriend for twenty-four hours.This should get interesting. Alex brought his face closer, and my eyelids closed,waiting for him to kiss me again. Nothing happened. Had I misinterpreted his intention? I opened my eyes, finding Alex just two centimetres from my face. My cheeks heated under his piercing gaze. From here, I could count the few freckles dotting his nose and cheeks. His tender eyes took my breath away. No one had ever looked at me like that. Unlike the others, Alex looked at me as if I meant everything to him. He was able to make me feel loved without even saying it. Deep down, I hoped he'd tell me anyway. Then I could tell him how I felt about him without him running away.
“I never realized how much you look like a doll,” he observed, taking my face in his palm.
That was rather unexpected and, if I may say so, a little anticlimactic. Maybe I should be brave for once in my life and tell him how I feel. Would he be ready to accept my feelings? The words were on the tip of my tongue, but when I opened my mouth, no sound came out. Why was it so hard? I pushed his hand away.
“Are you trying to tell me I'm pretty or artificial?”
Alex pretended to think, as if the question was really worth asking. “Good question. I'm not sure.”
I gave him a little tap on the shoulder. “You're ruining the moment! Shouldn't you be kissing me now that you finally have the chance?”
Alex burst out laughing. Where did this courage come from? “Oh, I see. You find me irresistible and you want to kiss me desperately, but you don't know how to ask.”
Touché. My cheeks flushed hotter. He'd hit the bull's-eye, as always. I shrugged nonchalantly, trying not to lose face, but it was all in vain. Alex knew me too well. Of course he was aware that I had an urge to kiss him.Fuck it!Leaving him no time to tease me or time for me to chicken out, I put my lips on his. And it was a failure—I'd gone too hard. It wasn't the first time we'dkissed, but it was the first time I'd been the one initiating it. Alex chuckled against my mouth.
“Sorry...”
“Don't be.”
“I'm not a good kisser.”
“Sure you are. You just put too much pressure on yourself, that's all.”
He drew invisible shapes on my cheeks without ever moving away from me. His scent made my head spin. Alex ran his fingers over my arms, sending shivers down my spine. He kissed me again, gently. Not wanting to spoil the moment, I hesitated before kissing him back. His kisses were so soft and patient, and every time he touched me, I wanted more.
He pulled away from me, grinning. “See? You're a good kisser.”
“You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”
Alex rubbed the back of his head. His cheeks reddened slightly. “I've been dying to kiss you again ever since that time in your kitchen.”
“Really?”
“You have no idea how addicted I am to you, now do you?”
