Page 146 of Perfect
It’s fuckingterrifying.
I stare at him, trying to explain. “Theo, Iwantthis, but it’s…it’ssomuch, all at once, and things…I don’t…I wasn’t ready…I wantyou,I’m just…I need…” I drag in a harsh breath and trail off, unsure I can explain my feelings.
Theo’s frozen, leaning forward in his chair, scrutinizing my face, and I’m glued to the spot under the weight of his gaze. He finally gives me a knowing smile and gets to his feet, walking towards me slowly and stopping in front of me, so close we’re almost touching. His eyes are fixed on mine and he’s so focused, so intense, sooverwhelming.
I missed this.
“You don’t have to be scared, sweetheart,” he says quietly. I stare up at him, my arms tightening around my waist to keep from grabbing him.
“We’re taking this slowly,” I breathe out unconvincingly. Theo raises one eyebrow at me in amusement as he bends toward me, bringing his face close to mine.
“Oh, I can take you slowly,” he teases, grinning when I laugh a little. I look down at my feet and shake my head.
“Ishouldleave,” I say, my voice shaky. Theo places two fingers under my chin and tips it back until I’m looking at him again, and he searches my face intently. I can feel myselfblushing under the intensity of his gaze, and a small, crooked smile appears on his face.
“You don’twantto leave, do you?” I shake my head a little, and his face becomes satisfied and smug. He’s entirely himself again in this moment, and I love him like this. “That’s my fucking girl,” he whispers, and my heart skips a beat. “Tell me what you want, and I’ll give it to you.”
I can’t keep myself from reaching for him, and his body tenses as my hands drift up his chest and wind in the hair at the nape of his neck. It’s even longer now, which I like, and I focus on the feeling of his hair in my fingers as I figure out how to tell him what I want. He looks down at me, barely blinking as we stare at each other, and any defenses I had left crumble as I look up at him.
“Theo, I want to gohome,” I whisper. He looks at me intently for a moment before his eyes widen, and his smile softens from smug to something surprised and tender. He winds his arms around my waist and drags me against him as he hovers his lips over mine, his words almost inaudible.
“Welcome home.” I melt into him, tilting my face up a fraction of an inch and grazing my lips against his. My entire body is a live wire the second I kiss him, and the kiss immediately deepens to something frantic and hungry. His hands come to my ass as he bends down to pick me up, groaning as he pulls my body flush against his. My legs lock around his hips, and my arms wind around my neck as I kiss him. I grip his hair and the back of his shirt and his neck as I pull him closer.
He keeps one arm locked around my waist as he stumbles towards the front door, his hand frantically, blindly reaching for the door handle. Somehow, he finds his way into the house and into the living room, never breaking our kiss. We topple down onto the couch, laughing a little before his lips find their way to my throat, and I whimper, dragging him closer. He pulls awayinstead, yanking his sweater off, and I’m pulling mine off in the next moment. He leans down to kiss my chest, but I push him off and start undoing his jeans.
He makes a rough, frustrated sound and grabs my wrists with shaking hands, stopping me. I look up at him, confused, finding his face lined with tension and hope and desperation.
“Is this real?” he begs. “I’m supposed to fuckingaskyou, and this seems too good to be true, so please tell me I’m not delusional.” I can’t help but laugh a little, shaking his hands off and undoing his belt.
“Baby, I promise this is real,” I say, looking up at him as I pull his belt off. His eyes go wide, and he makes a low groan and starts unbuttoning my jeans frantically, trying to yank them off. He starts swearing when they don’t slide off immediately, and I laugh and lift my hips, and he rips them and my thong off in one smooth motion.
I reach for him once I’m bare, but he’s already out of his clothes and on top of me again, kissing me deeply, his hands roaming over my touch-starved skin, his muscles tense beneath my fingers. He’s hard between my thighs, and I can already feel how wet I am for him when his head nudges against my slick entrance. I whimper, and he looks at me with wanton need, his body vibrating with tension.
“I need you,” I beg quietly, and he nods, his pupils blown wide. We both moan as he pushes inside of me slowly, gripping each other tightly. My head kicks back and my nails dig into his back as I stretch around him, feeling the familiar pressure and friction and fullness that I’ve missed so much. It’s been almost two months without him, and I can barely handle him anymore.
He takes his time working his way inside of me, kissing my throat and jaw and cheek as he goes, my breath coming in soft pants with every inch that he gives me. He pushes in the final bit, moaning loudly in my ear before he stills, his eyes shut tightfor a long moment before he looks down at me, his expression vulnerable and tender as he moves in me slowly.
“I’m so fucking sorry,” he whispers, and I shake my head as I tilt my hips up to take him deeper.
“It’s okay.” He exhales hard, nodding faintly and pulling himself back out again, slow enough for me to feel every delicious inch of friction before he rolls his hips, filling me again.
“I’m going to make you happy,” he says into my neck, and my eyes flutter closed, a soft moan escaping me as he presses a soft, open-mouth kiss right below my ear. I arch into him, running my hands over his back, clinging tightly to him.
“You already do.” He sighs and kisses me deeply, and I whimper and drag my nails along his back as he starts to thrust faster.
We move in tandem, finally back together where we belong, where everything makes sense.
I pull him tight, my legs wrapping around his hips and my arms around his shoulders as he lifts me into him, and I whine softly as he fills me with long, deep strokes. Every nerve crackles with electricity and I can feel heat slipping down my spine and building in my core. My leg tenses and twitches against his waist, and he grins, picking up his pace.
“Already? That’s my girl.”
“I’m yours,” I whisper, and his breathing picks up, his expression turning reverential. I know that look, know what’s coming, and my heart skips a beat in anticipation as he opens his mouth.
“I love you so fucking much, Alex,” he says, his voice thick with emotion, and my entire body hums as something electric passes through me. Tears heat the corner of my eyes, and I open my mouth to tell him, but an unfamiliar emotion courses through my body and overwhelms me, choking me, and nothingcomes out. I gasp, trying hard to say something,anything, feeling desperate as I look up at him, dying to tell him how I feel.
“Teddy,” I force out, but nothing but breath comes out after that.
Why can’t I say it? I knowI love him. I knew the second we got into the conversation today that I would finally tell him, but there’s so much emotion in my throat that I can’t speak. I take his face in my hands, nodding quickly, trying to make him understand. He looks surprised, his breathing picking up, his eyes darting between my eyes and my lips, his face hopeful and unsure. I nod harder, my breathing getting quicker. His bright hazel eyes flare wide, soft and hopeful when they meet mine, and a dam inside me breaks.
