Page 176 of Perfect
I’ve been asking to see Alex for days, but the nurses keep telling me I have to rest. I don’t listen to them. Sitting up alone is a struggle, and I’m so dizzy and tired from the effort that I fall over, and I get chastised by the nurses that rush in. They tell me that I have to stay in bed, and I tell them I have to see Alex.
When I try again a few hours later, I make it to the hallway before one of the nurses sees me. She takes pity on me, or on herself, and puts me in a wheelchair and takes me to the critical care ward to see Alex.
She’scoveredin bruises and bandages, hooked up to IVs and heart monitors, lying in bed and staring at the ceiling, her eyes unfocused and glassy. She doesn’t look at me, and I start to panic.
“Sweetheart?” She doesn’t respond, and she doesn’t react at all when I reach out to take her hand.
Her heart rate doesn’t even change.
I try not to panic, keeping my finger pressed against the pulse point in her wrist and watching her vitals as I interrogate the nurse. She tells me Alex is like this with everyone, that she mostly sleeps or stares at the ceiling. They did an MRI that showed her brain function is completely normal, but she’s not there.
I know how Alex gets when she’s stressed, and it’s just a matter of time and her feeling safe. I explain that, but the nurse doesn’t seem to listen to me and wheels me out of her room shortly after.
The hospital won’t let me stay in her room and they won’t give us a room together, no matter how much I beg, or offer to pay, or threaten to sue.
I wasn’t even supposed to be allowed to see her, apparently.
***
Two police officers show up to ask questions, an older balding man and a younger blonde woman who looks at me sharply. I’m so miserable from being separated from Alex and so loopy from the painkillers that I stupidly start to answer their questions.
“Your girlfriend’s in a bad way. Did you do that to her?” I level the blonde with a look of pure disgust.
“Her piece of shitpighusband did that to her,” I say slowly, and her face hardens.
“Detective Daniel Murphy was found brutally murdered yesterday by the property manager of the rental he was staying in. Did you do that tohim?”
I look up at the ceiling for a minute, realizing just how much shit I’m in. I’m probably going back to prison, and I don’t think I’m ever going to see Alex again, because I think she might have seen what I did to Danny.
Still, I want a chance.
“I need to call my lawyer.” The balding detective frowns.
“Mr. Anderson, we’re just wondering -”
“Nice try. Fuck off.”
***
Catherine comes to the hospital, showing up after she visits Alex. She tells me Alex is the same as when I saw her yesterday, and I quietly tell Catherine that I need an excellent criminal defense attorney as soon as possible.
A few hours later, Elise Hughes arrives from Portland, tall and well dressed and extremely displeased that I spoke to the police. I give her as much information about Alex’s past with Danny as I can quickly, I tell her how Danny found Alex, I tell her the truth about how I found Alex, and I tell her what happened in the cabin. I donottalk about Alex and my relationship, aside from the fact that we’ve been together for the last six months.
The police and the hospital decide to keep Alex and I separated, so on top of not seeing her, no one at the hospital is even allowed to tell me how she is.
My nurses getverytired of me asking, very quickly.
I’m losing my mind being separated from her and not being able to take care of her, and the doctors have to put me on sedatives just to manage me.
Officer Dent comes down and lets me know that I’m going to be detained on murder charges once the doctors clear me for release. He tells meifI’m acquitted, there will be a parole revocation hearing. Either way, the chances I go back to prison are incredibly high.
Dr. Mills comes down, and I’m so upset and on so much medication that I openly talk to her about my feelings for the first time. I don’t tell her how I found Alex or what happened toDanny, but I tell her about my feelings when I saw Alex on the bed. I talk about thinking she was dead, about what happened to her, about how badly I failed her, and I’m a fucking mess by the end of it.
To her credit, Dr. Mills mostly just listens.
She tells me I did something remarkable in saving Alex, and that I didn’t fail her at all, so she’s still a fucking idiot.
She’s also an asshole, because at her request, the hospital sends in a psychiatrist.
