Page 36 of Broken Hero
Dec mutters in my ear. “Couldn't stand there and watch you any longer. Dance with me?”
Dec dances? I mean, it’s a slowish song - but I didn't think he was the dancing type.
Beyond by Leon Bridgesis playing, it makes me feel that romance is all around. I relax into him, moving to the music. To anyone outside looking, it looks like we are a happy young couple in love. I’m not sure who we’re trying to fool. Are we trying to fool everyone into thinking it’s real, or are we trying to fool ourselves into thinking its fake?
Maybe it's the atmosphere of being here, as though I'm on holiday, I'm getting caught up in it all. Plus, I'm horny, which doesn't help.
We dance, melded together. When the song comes to an end, I look up at him, he's looking at me, his gaze so intense.
“Shall we go back to our room?” I ask him.
His look darkens. What is he thinking? He nods. “Come on.”
We say good night to Lydia and Gary and make our way up. He guides me out of the lift with his hand in the small of my back. When we enter the hotel room, things seem to get awkward between us. Neither of us knows how to speak or what to say.
“About earlier...”
I spin around - and sway a little as I do. “You don't have to talk about it.”
“No, I do. I feel like I need to tell you.”
“You don't have to explain anything to me, but I do think you should talk to someone.”
“I...fuck...this is so fucking hard, talking about this.”
“The scars - it's not only about how you got them, is it?”
I'm scared of what he's going to tell me.
He shakes his head, looking like a deer caught in headlights.
I feel for him. “Have you ever talked to anyone before? About how they happened?”
“I haven't wanted to.”
“What about your ex-girlfriend?”
He looks confused. “My ex-girlfriend?”
“Yeah, the one that you were upset about the night I saw you home. Did you talk to her about the scars?”
Realisation dawns on his face. “You mean Violet?”
I nod. “I think that's the name you mentioned that night.”
“She’s not my ex-girlfriend.”
Now it's my turn to be confused. “She’s not?”
“She was my fiancé. She...she died.” He swallows, looking down at the floor and walks over to sit on the bed.
I go cold as my stomach lurches. He was getting married and lost the woman he loves? I feel like I've been punched in the stomach. What is this man going through? I can't imagine how you carry on after something so devastating happens. My heart breaks for him. When I think back to the night in the pub, I want to cry. My heart aches for the guy propping up the bar drinking his sorrows away. The pain he must have been feeling.
“Jesus Dec, I'm so sorry, I had no idea, how did it happen? Or would you rather not tell me?”
“A fire. We were at a party around three years ago. We were both twenty-two, not a care in the world, you know? Life was about getting drunk and having fun. As long as we were together, we were happy doing whatever. She was drunk that night - we both were. To this day, no one is one hundred per cent sure how it started - they think a mixture of candles, alcohol and basically everyone being wasted, made it get out of hand quickly. You wouldn't believe how quickly a fire can spread. Truly. It goes through a house in minutes, given the right environment. I tried Soph...fuck, I tried.” His voice breaks.
I go over and sit on the bed next to him, place my hand on his knee and squeeze, trying not to let the tears fall for this beautiful man. He was there when it happened. Could it get any worse? “You tried to save her?”
