Page 63 of Broken Hero
I look at the clock at the fire station, 7.50, only ten minutes to go. I sigh. My mind has been on nothing else since Saturday night. This Phoenix guy is bad news. I looked into him when he bothered Sophie, so I know he owns a restaurant - or his cousin does, on Windmill Street. It’s where he does all his gambling too, I believe.
I'm no gambler - it's not like I could win the money back to pay off the debt, so I'm going to have to go and see if my size will deter him. When I don't want my size to intimidate people, it does, so maybe I can get it to work to my advantage this time. If I lay it on heavy, he might back off and listen to reason. Her dad is going to pay back whatever he owes, but I might be able to persuade this Phoenix guy to leave Soph alone in the meantime.
The fear that filled me last night when I realised she’d gone missing terrified me. I didn't even know the worst, that arsehole had taken her. After what we had done outside, which was fantastic - I knew she wouldn't just go missing. I regret fucking her in the alley so much now because that bastard watched us, but Christ at the time, it was the most amazing sex. I never even knew sex could be that good, that urgent - it was mind-blowing.
It shocked everyone on Saturday how much I care about her – hell, it surprised me. It still is surprising me. The more I think about it, about how I reacted, the more I know that I want this - whatever it is between her and me - to be something more. I want her, but not only physically, I want her in every way. But the guilt, Jesus, the guilt I feel every day, that I feel this way about her, I don't know how to deal with it. It will get easier and easier as time goes on, it has to.
I left her asleep in bed this morning - she’s due at the pub for a shift shortly.
“Dude, what is up with you today? You're like a lion about to pounce. You seem so tense and on edge.” Pete says
“It’s Soph. Do you remember the guy who came into the bar? Things have escalated, I won't go into detail, but he threatened her on Saturday. I need to do something. I'm gonna go and see him and get him to leave her alone.”
“I'm coming with you.”
“No way, man, I can't ask you to do that.”
“Did you ask?”
“Well no, but I don't know how ugly it could get. I don't want you involved.”
He looks at me for a minute, then shouts to the other guys sitting around the dining table eating whatever concoction someone has rustled up for them. They're still on shift until ten.
“Guys, you all know Soph, right? From the bar? Dec here is going to speak to the guys that threatened her. The situation has gotten worse. I'm going with him. Anyone else coming?”
“Pete, don't get them involved.”
“It’s not up to you.” He dismisses me.
They all stand up one by one and come to stand behind him.
I know what that means. Solidarity. They're showing me that they're with me - but how can I drag them into this?
I shake my head. “Guys, thanks, but it’s not your problem. It’s asking too much.”
“We’re brothers, aren't we?” Billy asks, frowning, as though I'm insulting him by saying he can't help.
“But man, it could be dangerous. I have no idea what I'm walking into.”
“You think a lot about Sophie, don't you?” Pete asks, his eyebrows raised. He knows that I have a past. He’s the only one that knows I lost Violet - I confided in him a year or so ago on a particularly bad day.
I look down. Damn that feeling of guilt again. “Yeah, I do.”
“We’re all in. Now when are you going?”
“After my shift finishes, ten minutes.”
They all nod. “We’ll come too - unless we get a call out. No one is gonna know.”
I sigh and look around; these are all good men. They’re my brothers, and I know I would do it for them.
“Thanks, guys. We’ll head off in a while.”
****
IDRIVE, AND THEREare three of the squad with me. I don't have any clue what I'm doing.
We pile out of the car, looking formidable. We’re all big and look a little intimidating all together - good - that’s the look I'm going for.
