Page 43 of Make Me A Sinner
"The nut house is more suited for you, but we already know they kicked you out of there several times." Set cuts off Whiro's fantasy before he gets explicit on us, and I'm sure neither of us wanted to hear where this was going.
"All the fun people are there... well, there and Bangkok, but I like to keep things close to home. Which reminds me, the grand opening is in three days. Chen’ll definitely be there, counting his money. I've heard he's a freak when it comes to cash, but the place won't be half as guarded as the casinos," Whiro says, filling me in on what he recently learned.
"I'm sure we can arrange something by then. I'll get someone on the inside. And when I get him, I'm gonna cut his fucking balls out for having the nerve to mess with something of mine," Set’s hand tightens on my waist as he speaks, his fingers digging into my flesh, already imagining the things he’d do to protect me. That's one thing I don’t doubt about him. He’ll protect me, no matter what.
I'm just not convinced he can protect me from himself.
I don't know why—it might be the moment of madness—or maybe it's because I’ve never felt this safe. Even though I'm in serious danger having a price on my head, my hand drifts to my stomach to meet his. Like I need to keep it there—to feel the warmth of his flesh on mine, maybe even to know that he’s mine.
My gesture takes him by surprise as much as it does me, and even if I feel his grip tightening, his face betrays no emotion. This man could love me to death, and I’d never know unless he wanted me to. And yeah, he does want me to know, so I’d feel like I've won the lottery. Maybe I did. But I also draw the short straw when it comes to damned souls. He’ll inevitably change me—if he hasn't done so already. Though I'm no longer sure it's a bad thing. I was living a miserable life with Nick, and I’ve got myself to blame for even considering having a baby with him. I wasn't happy. I was poor, on the run, alone at home all day—when I wasn’t stuck working at that damn gas station. Basically miserable. But since Set came along, I’ve lived every emotion known to man. Not all good. But Ilivedthem. I felt alive, protected, wanted. I felt fear, adrenaline... and something else too. Something that I’m not ready to admit—not even to myself yet, though the tingle in my stomach when he's around is all too obvious. Maybe if I don't say it out loud, it isn’t real. I want to hold off saying it out loud, even to myself, because I need to get accustomed to what it means—to what Set means.
Whiro keeps talking about how they’ll go in and kill everyone until they get to Chen. So much for avoiding a war. But maybe there won’t be a war if no one's left to fight back. That’s the plan anyway—take out Chen and his right-hand man. Not that I can really focus on their words, as Set's fingers dance on my skin, almost sending me into a trance. He's not even doing anything to me, just absentmindedly moves a few fingers on my stomach while planning an assassination.
I'm not sure I'm even listening to the whole conversation—until there’s something that grabs my full attention. "You're coming with us. When it's safe enough for you to enter, of course." Set says, turning his head to look at me.
"Wh...what?" I ask, hoping this won't be another lesson, and he won’t make me kill Chen myself. "Why?" I ask, but I’m abruptly cut off by Set.
"Questions later," he whispers, his voice low and commanding, making it clear this isn’t a topic he wants to discuss with his brother in the room.
I nod, understanding that this might be something he wants to answer on his own terms, but even though I don't see why he couldn't say it in front of Whiro. He seems comfortable around him, even affectionate when it comes to me.
They keep discussing the plan for a few minutes, and since Set doesn't seem to get rid of Whiro, he agrees to let him in on the fun. In fact, he’s going in tomorrow to meet with Set's men. Because, although he seems certifiable, from what Set says, he's a natural-born hunter and a very well-trained mercenary. And this whole operation won't be easy. Hitting a strip club full of people on opening night comes with risks—no matter how big your crew is and how influential you are in the city. There's no way they can keep something like this under wraps—or wipe up an entire strip joint off the map without leaving a trail.
Though, as much as I hate to admit it, I am genuinely impressed by the extent Set would go to protect me. I know it's not just his pride that he’s trying to protect. He did his best to avoid a direct war with Chen over that artifact, but when it comes to me, he’s stepping up.
Whiro eventually leaves, not before he goes through all the kitchen drawers to find what he callsa suitable knifefor the night. I don't know what that means, but neither Set nor I ask him about it—probably because we really don’t want to know. Might save us from being called to the stand in a murder trial... or maybe just keeps us from being unwilling extras in one of his twisted sexual fantasies. Either way, once the door closes. I'm heading straight to bed.
Set is right behind me and makes sure to reclaim his place on the pillows next to me—not necessary to find sleep, more like face my quiet interrogation. There are just too many questions in my head to find peace. "You told me you don't remember your past, but couldn't Whiro help? I mean, he's your brother."
His eyes meet mine, his full attention locked on me. "Whiro isn't my only brother." Set props himself up on one elbow to get a better look at me. "But none of us remembers the whole picture. Just flashes... bits and pieces. Some details, yeah. But never full events or clear memories."
"You said you’d tell me about it one day," I press.
"One day. Not now," his words are clipped, like I’m supposed to drop it.
But I can't. The curiosity’s just too great. "Why not now?" I shift a little closer, his head now hovering above mine.
"You know why not now," he mutters like my question offends him.
Yes… I think I know why. "Because you don't trust me."
"Should I?" he arches a brow, looking at me like I damn well know what I've done. And he's right. Why should he trust me? Itried to kill him. I tried to run away. I’ve done nothing but give himattitude.
But at least I am honest with him, "I don't know, Set."
"With time, I’ll trust you." One of his thumbs traces the curve of my bottom lip gently, lifting my head higher until I feel my breath start to fade. He still hasn't kissed me since I came back, and the thought haunts me more and more each day.
The tension between us is so thick that I can barely think straight. I know he feels it too, but I also know he won't act upon it. He wants me to kiss him. He wants me to give in and make the first move. He wants me to earn him.
But I'm not giving in to him, no matter how tempting that might sound. "You said you’ll answer my earlier question. So why do you want me to come with you when you go after Chen?"
"You’re so good at deflecting when you're under pressure. But fine, I'll humor you." His attention goes to the edges of my robe as he speaks, fingers idly playing with the fabric. "I want you to see what I’d do for you. How I’d kill kings. Burn cities." His hand brushes the outline of my breast. "I want you to understand how far I’d go for you. How precious you are to me." His damn hand stops right before slipping down my stomach, and I'm seconds away from begging him to fuck me—take whatever’s left of me and make it his. But I know it won't work like that. I've hurt him too much for him not to make me pay for it.
"I don't want you to go after Chen because of me. I don't want you to—" I don't have the power to go on.
But Set does, "To get hurt? That it? Let’s be real, you can hurt me much more than Chen ever could." His words make me swallow the painful knot rising in my throat. "Chen should’ve thought of that before he came after you. He signed his own death certificate. And why are you concerned anyway about me getting hurt? Did my tongue feel so good on your pussy that you suddenly decided you might want to keep me?"
I instantly turn my back on him at the sound of his laughter. He catches my waist and draws me into him, slamming me against his chest, back in the same cuddle position we were before Whiro came.
