Page 39 of Axe
“Thank you,” she simply said and it was the sweetest thing I’d heard her say to me.
I was just fucking over the moon and relieved that she didn’t fight me on it. Maybe we were getting somewhere or it could have been that I was just being overly hopeful.
“I hope you don’t mind me setting it up in here. Thought this way you could have your own space,” I whispered as our bodies leaned closer to one another so we could continue to talk in hushed tones.
“Yeah, this is good. He used to have his own room. He also used to sleep through the night…maybe this will help.”
Her eyes twinkled and I couldn’t seem to look away from her. Our faces were inches apart and I recognized that look that clouded her eyes.
One, I’d seen it in other women, many times before.
And two, I was thinking the exact same thing right then.
I reached up and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. Touching her only seemed to strengthen the feelings I had brewing inside. Her eyes half closed as my fingers brushed the sensitive skin behind her ear.
Her sweet smell invaded my nose. Her breaths came out in pants and it tickled against my lips. I wanted her, there was no denying that. I wanted to kiss those plump lips. Fuck that, I wanted to devour them, and then the rest of her. I wanted to slide my hand up those creamy thighs and find out how wet I could make her.
There were so many reasons why this was fucking wrong. One of them was currently passed out on my leg at the moment. The weight of his little body brought me back to reality.
“This isn’t a good idea,” I said, effectively snapping us out of our trance. “I’m not a good man.” And if that wasn’t the damn truth. I had no doubt she had some sort of idea of what I was involved in.
She blinked and her spine straightened a little. And just like that, I missed the heat coming off of her body.
“You may have an idea about club life, but you have no idea who I am and what I’ve done,” I said, reeling myself in as much as I could.
She pinned me with her stare and her brow arched high as if she was challenging me. Fucking hell, I loved her feisty spirit. It may have been the sexiest thing about her.
As if she were clearing her thoughts, she shook her head then looked down at Neiryn. He was sound asleep, his little snores filled the long stretched silence around us.
I leaned over and scooped him up, careful not to wake him. Without looking at her again, I stepped cautiously around her and walked down the hall and into her bedroom. As I carefully placed him down in his pen, I couldn’t help but smile at how peaceful he looked. I didn’t move from that spot for a few minutes, even when I heard her get up and head down the stairs.
Both of us clearly needed a moment of space, but that didn’t mean this conversation was over. I had to get her to understand why this was a horrible idea. She had to see why I was no good for her and the boy. She was running from one bad situation and it wouldn’t be right if I put her right into another one. In my heart, that was what I believed, that I was the last thing they needed.
As I stood there, my breaths came out slow and heavy as I tried to picture her life in the future.
She needed to find a good, decent man. One that didn’t have blood on his hands and the weight of a past like mine on his shoulders. One that didn’t wake up in the middle of the night with rage flowing through his veins. A banker or an accountant—someone that could provide for the two of them and had a safe, if not a bit dull, life. Some motherfucking prick that would never be good enough for her but would be able to make her happy.
I took in a deep breath, my lungs expanding to capacity before I let the air rush out, and then I headed downstairs in search of Allison.
I found her in the kitchen making coffee. Her back was to me and the small bulb over the stove provided the only light, casting an angelic glow around her frame.
I stepped up to the island that was awkwardly placed in the middle of the kitchen. I say awkwardly because the space was almost too small to accommodate an island. But Ethel being Ethel, insisted that the place needed it.
After the coffee pot gurgled and sputtered its last drops, she poured two cups, then gently slid one across the island to me. The steam clouded her face as she brought her own cup to her lips. With a long, drawn-out breath, the steam danced in front of her lips as if it was fighting to rise. The very same lips I had been inches from only moments ago. The ones that I’d spent way too much time thinking about in so many ways—mostly wrapped around my cock. But, still, I also imagined what it would be like to kiss them, to feel how soft they were against my own.
She set the cup down on the counter beside her, effectively pulling my attention away from her mouth. In one swift movement, she lifted herself up and back onto the counter, her legs dangled over the edge and her ankles crossed.
My palms planted themselves on the cool wood top of the island. I felt like I was on fire and I couldn’t seem to take my eyes off of her. It seemed she couldn’t look away from me either. The air was thick around me and I wondered if I was the only one having trouble breathing. My fingers pressed down onto the unforgiving surface so hard my nail beds turned white. I needed something to ground me, to chain me in place. All I wanted to do is go over to her and that was the last thing either one of us needed.
I had come to realize that she not only drove me crazy, but I also couldn’t control myself around her. I wanted to take everything she had to give and more. I wanted to break her, but only so she could realize that she was strong enough to rebuild herself. So that she could see what she was really capable of. I wanted to own her yet, help her stand tall. None of it made sense and I was tired of trying to understand the workings of my mind.
After a long stretch of intense silence, she opened her mouth to speak.
“I know you’re in a motorcycle club. I also know that you’re an Enforcer and that involves doing some…less savory things sometimes. Killing probably being one of them,” she said, her voice strong and confident. Though I knew I was a scary guy, she didn’t shrink down to me, ever. I think that was what captivated me the most about her.
Her words filtered into my ears and I did my best not to tense. If she wanted my attention, she damn well had it right then. I waited, desperate to hear what else she had to say.
“I know that in any situation you would not hesitate to put the club first, even if that means doing something you may be unsure of.” My eyes shifted to her throat as she worked down a hard swallow.
