Page 56 of Clean Hack
Derrick cleared his throat and took a moment before he spoke again.
I got the feeling like he was closer to the guy on the other end than he was with anyone else. Or at least, any of the other Paragon men. I only wished I could have known which one it was.
“Yeah, I’d say so,” he said then swallowed hard as though he felt like he’d said too much with me right there. “Anyway, I have someone that needs to get in touch with Allison. Can you make that happen.”
“Yep, I’ll make the call. It might be a while. I’m sure you understand. Axe’s protective over her and Neiryn. And I know he wants to give them quiet time together.”
Neiryn.
That must have been her little boy’s name. Tears sprung to my eyes at the sound of it and I desperately wanted to get to meet him.
“Thanks. Do what you can. Just know, I got someone here that really needs to hear from her.”
“I got it. I’ll make it happen.”
Then he brought the phone away from his ear and part of me wanted to breathe a sigh of relief, while the other part wanted to hold my breath until I heard her voice.
“Thank you,” I whispered and kissed him softly on the lips.
I couldn’t get over how comfortable I felt with him. It had been a long time since I’d had actual in-person closeness like this. Come on, I was someone that got excited by my pizza delivery boy time. A conversation that didn’t last longer than probably three minutes and it wasn’t like he was talking to me because he wanted to. He was doing his job. And while he was sweet and went above and beyond, with the whole grocery shopping thing, there was still a sense of pity in his eyes. He wasn’t my friend. I didn’t call him just to hang out and watch TV or whatever people that were friendly did.
Yeah, I was pathetic.
I knew it.
And I wasn’t going to deny it.
But that didn’t help me figure out this whole thing that was going on right now. How I felt so comfortable and at ease. I shouldn’t have. In fact, I felt more awkward around people the more the years ticked on. I’d isolated myself so much that I only knew how to interact with myself. God, that sounded so sad. But I was well aware of its truth.
“I lost you somewhere?” His smooth voice broke me out of my thoughts.
“I just…”Have no idea what to say?I mean, it wasn’t an easy thing to open up, especially now.
But I didn’t have to, because my stomach decided to let out a super loud and embarrassing grumble, effectively turning our attention to it.
“I need to feed you,” he said with a chuckle.
“It seems like it,” I replied back jokingly.
“I don’t have much here. Can you hold off about twenty minutes so I can run down to the store?”
“Sounds like I don’t have much of a choice,” I said teasingly as I smiled up at him.
“Alright,” he said tapping my back as a way to tell me to get up. I hesitantly did. We were in a little bubble here in this room, in this bed, and I didn’t want to pop it. “I’ll be back as soon as possible. Eggs sound good?”
I nodded as I rested my head on the pillow and pulled the comforter around me.
“Just don’t expect me to get out of this bed before you get back,” I said loving how fucking comfortable it was. Like for real. It was a good mattress. And the pillows, just the right amount of firmness to cradle my head and not make me feel like I was suffocating.
“You are welcome to stay there as long as you like,” he said and turned so quickly I wasn’t able to read his expression.
He ducked into the closet, changed behind the closed door, then was back out in another super soft looking shirt and a pair of jeans. I couldn’t help but take him in and how good he looked in jeans. He offered me a slow smile before he headed on his way.
I took in a deep, calming breath once I was alone. Where was I supposed to go from here? I imagined that at some point I’d have to make my way back to my apartment. I had a life to get back to. Only, I really didn’t. It wasn’t like there was anyone waiting for me to return. I had no commitments to other people or plans. I had…nothing. I didn’t even have a pet that was missing me. Which was maybe good because I wasn’t there to feed it anyway. But that wasn’t the point.
That was the moment I started to feel shaky and antsy.
Sure, Allison was safe but that didn’t mean she was the only one out there. There were missing persons to find. Kids that had been snatched right off the streets. Bad guys to shut down. And all the other stuff I had done for the last few years in between my keeping an eye out for Savage.
