Page 16 of Unspoken Confessions
6
Jameson
It was only the second night here and I was going out of my mind. Part of that had to do with me and I knew it. This job wasn’t stimulating enough to keep me out of my head. That was a place I desperately didn’t want to be. It didn’t help that a certain day was rapidly approaching. A day that I didn’t want to even acknowledge as much as I deserved to be reminded of it.
So here it was in the middle of the night and where was I again? On the couch in the main room watching the TV on silent and only half paying attention to the words scrolling on the bottom of the screen. I wouldn’t say I wanted Austin’s company should he come in and bother me, but it was better than being alone. That was pathetic and sad. I fucking hated him and here I was, waiting for him to come distract me and simply piss me off with his presence.
I forced myself to think of anything but my past. Which only led me to thinking back to this morning. Why had it played out like it had? I was to blame, of course, and I fucking knew it. I couldn’t explain it. Why had I made both of them breakfast? Why had I been so damn adamant that Nick got something good to eat? And why the hell did I have this huge urge to put myself between the two of them? Thank fuck I came to my senses quick and took the farthest seat from Austin that I could get without going in a completely different room. Still not sure why I’d put Nick so damn close to me though.
This job was already getting to me. It started screwing with my head the moment I opened the folder and saw that picture. The moment I realized my charge was going to be the nameless man from the club that I hadn’t been able to shake for some fucking reason. The man that I swore I hated the moment he met my gaze that first time.
But I was here and there was nothing to be done about it. I had to pull back. Keep strictly professional which shouldn’t have been hard for me to do at all. And I swore it wouldn’t be.
Footsteps on the stairs snapped me out of my thoughts. Since I knew Austin was outside doing a perimeter sweep, the only other person it could have been was Mr. Movie Star himself.
I slowly sucked in a deep breath and gripped the edge of the couch cushion like I was bracing for impact. When I felt him draw near, it was all I could do to keep my eyes locked on the screen. I’d hoped that like last night, he’d run back upstairs, but the asshole shocked me by strutting over to the couch and dropping down right beside me.
I ground my teeth together, angry at him for invading my space like this. It was one of those huge, L-shaped couches and he chose to plant his ass not even two feet from me.
Must not deck the client.
I had to repeat that a few times in my head.
Yeah, I had some issues with anger, but I’d been able to control them by now. Even if the thought of hitting his pretty face might have made me feel good for a moment, I’d never actually do it. I wasn’t violent, at least not in situations like this. And besides, if I hadn’t hit Austin by now, then this guy was definitely safe.
“What are you watching?” he asked and I said nothing in return.
That was just me, and I didn’t give two shits if he took it as me being rude or not. Truth was, I didn’t care one bit what he thought of me. I lived my life the way I did because I had to. It was the only way I knew how to go on. And if he chose to take it personally, then that was on him.
“Cool. Good story, bro,” he responded, his tone dripping with sarcasm, and then wiggled his body like he was getting all cozy on the couch as if he’d planned on staying a while.
What the hell was I watching?
I must not have been paying attention.
I focused back on the images on the TV, catching a few sentences that flowed across the bottom of the screen.
Oh, right. Some show about the moon. I hadn’t learned much, but that was mostly because I was barely paying attention. When I turned it on it had sounded interesting enough and I was all for learning new things. It must have been this house and this job because I couldn’t focus for shit.
“The moon, huh? Interesting. I don’t know much about it other than it goes around the earth chasing the sun.” He let out a laugh and it was a tad bit dorky sounding. I couldn’t tell you why the fuck I found it cute. I wondered if that was how he laughed when he was out being Mr. Perfect Movie Star. Probably not, but I still wanted to know the answer to it. “Honestly, thinking about outer space scares me. There’s no end. The thought of how big Earth is blows my mind. There are still things yet to be discovered here, I’m sure. And space is like a gazillion times bigger. Plus, if you’re out there and something happened, you’d just be floating around forever. Seems like a scary way to spend your last few moments or days or whatever it may be.”
Is he going to shut up anytime soon?
“When I was a kid, my father sent me a telescope one year for Christmas. I kept waiting for him to come home and ask me to show it to him. I was afraid he’d find out that I hadn’t ever actually opened it and hid it under my bed instead. I didn’t want to look at the stars because it made everything around me seem so expansive and endless. I felt small and everything around me was bigger. I couldn’t ever reach them and my little kid brain kept coming up with all the things that could be between me and the stars. I didn’t like it.” He let out a short, nervous laugh. “Guess it was a good thing that he’d forgotten what he got me by the time he did return home.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I caught his shrug.
Okay, that was a sad story. And the way he was clearly trying to brush off his issues with feeling abandoned by his daddy was even sadder.
I didn’t want to admit that there was more to Nick Sterling than meets the eye, but it seemed there was.
I held my groan back. I didn’t want to like this guy and he was unintentionally making me feel a little prick of pity for him.
Not knowing what else to do, I picked up the remote and changed the channel. I stopped when I heard him suck in an excited breath. Great, mid-nineties sit-com. Not something I enjoyed at all. But, hell, if it got him to shut up and forget that I was there for twenty minutes, I had no problem leaving it on.
It worked for about ten minutes.
When he noticed I wasn’t so much as snickering beside him, he cocked his head to the side and eyed me. By the way he was letting that dorky laugh roll out of himself over and over again, he was highly amused by the show.
