Page 29 of Unspoken Confessions
I breathed out a long breath. Now was not the time to get paranoid and lose my shit.
“Then again, it is early and maybe they’re not awake so they’re not even aware of Nick’s routine. And if it’s not someone from inside the community then how would they be able to gain access?”
His hand aggressively ran through his hair while his eyes continued to be stuck doing that far away lost thing.
“So there must be something we’re missing,” he practically mumbled.
“Like what?” Jen asked, his eyes volleying between Austin and myself.
“Not sure,” Austin said. His voice was a little off and I studied him, easily seeing that he was in his head right now. He was trying to work it out from every possible angle in order to see what could have been right in front of us. “I need to call Remy.”
Austin headed for the door and I let him go. He was thinking something and he’d fill me in once he had it all worked out.
I might have hated him, but he was good at this job. As much as it begrudged me to admit it, he was an important part of the team when it came to things like this. That said, I still had issues with him in the field when I needed him to have my back. Did I think he’d leave me hanging on purpose? No. But that didn’t mean that there wasn’t a chance that his issues would come up at any moment and leave me exposed to get shot or even killed.
The door closed and I felt Jen’s attention on me.
I turned my head slowly and met his waiting eyes. I saw something there I didn’t think I’d ever seen before. And I wasn’t sure it was something he felt very often. Or if he did, he didn’t let it show.
“Let’s not call it a mistake, but yes, I shouldn’t have come on to you,” he said as he rose to his feet. “That’s on me. I love Nick and he is dear to me. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t have my own issues that I haven’t overcome.”
I gave him a slow nod of my head. I wasn’t completely sure what the fuck he was getting at but I wanted this conversation over and done with.
“I didn’t know. That’s not an excuse, I know that. I see it now.” Jen looked lost for a moment, like there was a hint of regret and sadness dimming the light in his eyes.
He stood tall and met my gaze before he continued.
“It won’t be easy for him,” he said sternly. “If you go for it, be the man he needs. That’s all I ask.” He paused, making sure to stare me down for a long moment. I held my ground, doing my best not to give anything away. “He’s… he’s my best friend, and I will kill you if you hurt him.”
I snorted and rolled my eyes.
“Glad we understand each other,” he said as he patronizingly patted my chest.
I gave him a firm nod to let him know we were on the same page. And maybe let him think that he’d intimidated me a little.
A slow smirk spread on his face.
“One day, I’ll hear you talk,” he said and then turned his back and sauntered out of the room.
Which had me letting free another eye roll, but I was slightly smiling, too.
The thing about Jen, he didn’t have any expectations. I think that was the thing that made him most special. He didn’t judge you for being you. And he took you however you came. So far, he hadn’t pushed the thing about my silence pretty much all the time. I only spoke when it was important. The interesting thing was, once you realized when those moments were, you began to see how few and far between they were. Jen wondered but he never pushed. He never tried to poke me until I blurted out something just to shut him up. Which clashed with his brazen, bold attitude.
And then I was thinking how glad that I was that Nick had someone like Jen on his side.
That was something I absolutely had no business thinking.
Nick wasn’t anything to me other than my charge.
But that thought stabbed me in the chest and caused a small ache deep inside.
Fuck me.
This could not be happening.
And because I was a person who didn’t like to hide from things, I had no choice but to deal with it right now.
Somewhere along the way, I’d started to like the sides that Nick let me see.
