Page 91 of Holiday on the Rocks
“Yes, you had no control of yourself. When you were with her all hell broke loose and she almost didn’t make it out alive. I’ll call in the fuckin’ cavalry to make sure that doesn’t happen again.”
With that he walked away, and I suddenly came to realize I was at the point in life where I needed a stronger word than fuck.
Allie had gone against them all back in the day for me, and here I was again. Wanting to push her for more than closure in Colorado and I’d be asking her to do it all again.
FORTY-THREE
ALLIE
IT’S A CLUSTER
Once back at the house I went to the bathroom and when I opened the door, I was suddenly pushed right back into the bathroom by Clint.
“Hi.”
“Hello.”
“We haven’t had any time to talk between all the people in this house and the whole baked goods thing.” He chuckled. “Can you even believe today?”
“I know. It’s been a cluster.”
He pulled me close, and I looked into those brown eyes that were warm and familiar. “Can we chat tonight?”
He had a twinkle in his eye, and I was as nervous as a snowman in July. Levi had announced he would be my nighttime visitor this evening. What in the bibbity bobbity shitballs was happening, and how would this thing play out?
Option one: see Levi under the cover of night. Option two; see Clint? Yeah, I might be going to hell for this.
I glanced out the window and wondered if I’d break any pertinent bones if I just jumped now.
“Ya know Clint, I think Emily has something planned for the girls tonight. She’s been busy with her family today. I should probably keep my calendar open for bridezilla.” Maybe true, it seemed like something she’d do. “How about in the morning?”
He kissed me, and I froze as my heart drummed a rock solo. While Levi and I were just a closure thing, Clint suddenly felt wrong. And that was wrong. I would be outta here after the wedding with Levi off to another continent; there would be no us. And he made it as clear as a nuclear bomb that he doesn’t do relationships. And the dozen women callers was a reminder that he was a good time guy. Fun and done.
I could see it now; even as a forty-year-old man Levi would still have the charm and sexiness that would have women of all ages hoping to catch his eye. Yeah, he’d bounce from the beaches with Brazilian beauties to the Austrian Alps and snow bunnies; the man would have a life normal men would only dream of.
I needed to get my head on straight because I couldn’t walk out of this broken. Again. I didn’t want to have to get over Levi. Again. The “missing him” reaching the center of my bones, and the ache that I knew was the equivalent of being beaten by a spiked baton.
Clint was a solid option that would never hurt me. While it was a question mark, maybe I should leave the door open for something now or in the future? But I didn’t need anyone either; it was safer for me to just count on myself.
While I wanted to push him away, I let him kiss me. I kissed him back, and it was a nice kiss. Really nice, actually. So why was my stomach going like a popcorn machine?
I focused more. Yes, focus on the man who came to Colorado for me. The one who didn’t leave me in a hospital with signed annulment papers on the little table beside the bed.
I dove deep into concentration mode. I pushed myself to experience Clint’s kiss, and it was still nice. Yes, I just needed to concentrate more.
I did a quick recap to find I’d used the words concentrate, forced, and focus when kissing someone. Time to regroup. I pushed his chest. Clearly, I needed a 500 mg dose of Fuckitol to deal with whatever the hell my life had become.
“We’d better get back.”
He opened the door, and I stepped out to see Levi in the hall. Are you kidding me right now? He smiled until Clint stepped out behind me. His jaw instantly clenched, and his eyes burned me before I quickly looked away. Just when things couldn’t get more awkward Clint wiped his lips of my lip gloss and let out a little chuckle. UUUGGGHHH.
“Sorry if we kept you waiting.”
Clint took my hand, and I sort of wanted to die as we walked into the kitchen.
FORTY-FOUR
LEVI
