Page 83 of Bound By the Duke
She was ready to let whatever was unfolding between them grow. But every time they grew closer, he took a step back.
“What is it?” Hyacinth broke the silence, studying her closely. “Is something wrong?”
Aurelia shook her head quickly.
But her friend was no fool. Hyacinth saw the way her brown eyes betrayed her unease, the way her fingers trembled slightly. Her question, gentle and teasing, hung in the air.
Aurelia could not bring herself to answer. Her heart lurched, and her breathing grew shallow.
What would she say? That her body trembled at the memory of his touch? That she was scared he regretted every time his mouth fiercely claimed hers? That he acted like a man with a dark secret?
She wanted to know. Needed to know what exactly was holding him back. Because she was already into him.
Even now, seated in a respectable establishment, she felt her heart and body whisper for more.
That realization was nothing but a great reminder of how much trouble she was in.Great trouble.
“Aurelia?” Hyacinth’s voice interrupted her thoughts once again. When Aurelia looked up, her friend was staring back at her with an amused smile. “Are you still here with me, or has the great Duke of Whitmore stolen your thoughts entirely?”
Aurelia exhaled shakily, then managed a rueful smile, though her heart was hammering. “I am here.” She sighed and then paused. “But… you are not wrong, Hyacinth. He has stolen my thoughts, completely.”
Hyacinth’s brows rose with intrigue, saying everything she couldn’t. Her expression shifted, as if she were watching someone willingly step into the trap of love.
“I think…” Aurelia trailed off. She sat up straighter and dragged air into her lungs, as if bracing herself for a dangerous admission. “I have fallen deeply for him. Too deeply.”
“Deeply.” Hyacinth’s lips parted in delight, her brows almost touching her hairline now. “Falling, Aurelia? You? Oh, this is delicious!”
“I couldn’t help it.” Aurelia’s eyes dropped to her lap. “The ton thinks him distant, cold, even a beast.” A bitter chuckle escaped her lips. “Yet with me… with me, I catch glimpses of a softness. Of a man who listens, even when he pretends not to. A man who guards more than he lets on. Sometimes he looks at me as though he cannot stop himself.”
Hyacinth leaned forward and rested her chin in her hand, her eyes twinkling with interest. “And this makes you… happy?”
“Yes,” Aurelia murmured, unable to stop her voice from trembling slightly. “Happy… and yet frightened. For I never expected to feel so much. To want so much.”
“Frightened?” Hyacinth echoed, furrowing her brow. “Why are you frightened, if your heart is so full?”
Aurelia pressed her lips together. She wasn’t sure how to proceed. She searched for the right words, looking out the window at the bustling streets.
How was she going to explain that the man she loved so dearly did not want to lie with her?
“Because I want to give him what he deserves. I don’t want to be his wife in name only. I want to be closer to him. I… I feel we are already getting there, to be frank.”
Hyacinth frowned, puzzled. “What do you mean??”
Aurelia took a deep breath and clasped her hands tightly in her lap. “A child.”
“And why does that bother you so?” Hyacinth asked carefully.
“He is against the notion,” Aurelia answered. Although her words were brief, they tasted bitter in her mouth. “But I want to give him that because—because it is my duty as his duchess.”
“Just because of that?” Hyacinth folded her arms slowly.
Aurelia knew her friend could read her. So, with a sigh, she shook her head. “And maybe… maybe because I long for it. For him.” Her voice dropped to a whisper. “I want to lie with my husband. I want his body, his touch. I want him to claim me.”
Silence fell between them.
Hyacinth’s lips parted as she processed her words. “But he hides. That is the problem,” she concluded.
Aurelia could only nod before she picked up her teacup. The tea had turned cold now, but she didn’t mind. She had more things to worry about.
