Page 111 of The Widower
Joshua nodded, and I turned toward the place where Colin had gone.
COLIN ADAMS
“I’m a worthless human being, aren’t I?”
Standing in front of my daughter’s gravestone, I all but fell apart.There’s nothing about the man I’ve become that I can be proud of.No one around me can stand me anymore—and I make sure of it. Every single day, I give people one more reason to hate me.
“Everything would’ve been different if I’d saved you, sweetheart. I couldn’t… I’m sorry.”
Remembering the day she died still tears me apart in ways words can’t touch. The pain is so deep it’s almost unmeasurable—and now I understand that some wounds hurt far more than anything physical ever could.
Knowing your entire world can shatter in a matter of seconds feels impossible to believe until it happens. You never see it coming. But once it does—once your life turns upside down because of one stupid mistake—everything starts to make sense in the worst possible way. You never see life the same again.
“You and Joshua are the most important people in my life.”
The words left me trembling, my tears coming harder. My daughter will never again tell me she loves me, never again call me the most important man in her world.
Then the rage hit—sharp, wild—and I started pounding the ground, my fists sinking into the grass of the place that only brings me pain.I never thought I’d have to bury my own child. Now I’m a wreck—completely undone, without an ounce of control left in me.
“Why me, God?! Why do you hate me so much?!What did I do to deserve this kind of hell?Take me! Why my daughter?! Answer me!”
But of course, there was no answer. There never was.
I collapsed on the grass and cried like a child.
My life ended the moment my daughter’s did.
ISABELLE CAMPBELL
Watching Colin lying there on the grass, crying, tore something inside me.
I knew I was intruding on a private moment, and part of me felt awful for it—but another part knew, without a doubt, that he needed help.
When he finally sat up, I acted before I could think.
“Hey… it’s okay.” I wrapped my arms around him, but Colin just kept crying, his whole body shaking with grief.
The weight he carried in his chest was crushing, and I had no idea how to ease it. How could I, when Maddison was never coming back?
He bottled up all his anger and pain, never letting any of it out. I was terrified of the day he’d reach his breaking point—when he’d stop wanting help altogether and drown in something so dark it might destroy him.
“You don’t have to stay here,” he whispered.
“Leaving you like this isn’t an option.”
“Isabelle, please…”
“I’m not leaving you! I’m not!”
I held him tighter. He didn’t fight me, but he didn’t turn to face me either. Listening to him cry while staring at his daughter’s grave shattered me in ways I didn’t know I could break. Watching that scene—his pain, his loss—was almost unbearable.
Minutes passed. Colin and I stayed there, both kneeling before Maddison’s grave. It felt too personal, too sacred, and I couldn’t help but think I didn’t belong in that moment. It was his.
“Dad.”
The small voice came from behind us, and Colin turned, startled.
His face was wrecked. His eyes looked darker than usual, lifeless. The sadness etched into his features wasn’t ordinary—it was the kind that hollowed you out from the inside. Seeing it undid me, piece by piece. I didn’t know why I cared so much for Colin Adams… only that I did. And I wasn’t going to abandon him.
