Page 18 of Once Upon A Wish
“If I did – I would have run back to you.”
“I wish you had.”
“I wish I had too.”
“So, what now?” He stuck the straw back in his mouth and sipped.
“Now, will you accept my fucking apology?”
“I like watching you squirm. I always did.” He managed without ever taking the straw out of his mouth. Yeah – it was hot.
I sighed as I remembered how he made me squirm. I was about to shoot in my pants if he kept this flirty thing up.
“So…”
He laughed loudly. “Fine. I accept your stupid apology. A couple days ago, I didn’t think that I would have thought I would have. Damn… Coming back here has… It has really made me think about what’s important.”
“Yeah, this place has some great memories.” And all of them were about Jax. Well, most of them, anyway.
“Maybe there will be… more.” He cocked his eyebrow as he stared at me. I gulped.
“Jax?” It hurt to even bring up what was running through my mind. He was flirting with me, and I wanted him so badly that it hurt. But… “You’re not staying here.”
His dark blue eyes opened widely. “What does that have to do with anything? Maybe I’ll stay here a lot more? Maybe a lot of things?”
Ah – stupid hope shot through me like an adrenaline injection. “I really wish you would. It would be nice to see you more often. I don’t want to lose you again when you go back to LA. I hope we can be in each other’s lives. If nothing else, I’ve missed my friend.”
“Isn’t that becoming pretty obvious, Kenny?” The look on his face – so serene and full of hope made my heart skip a beat. I had never dared to think that there would ever be another chance for us. I knew how much I had hurt him.
“Can I ask you a question? I promise it’s not loaded or anything. I’m just curious.”
“Shoot.” He stirred his milkshake with his straw.
“Was staying in the closet the right choice?”
“Losing you was the wrong choice.”
“I’m not trying to make what I did… ok… I’m just…”
He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. “The closet remained because I had no reason to come out. Why rock the boat when I had no one to help me steady it later. There might have been some difficulty if I had come out - but in the end… I can’t know what might have happened. How I would have handled it when it happened. I don’t know. I wasn’t happy. How could I be when the only person I ever really loved wasn’t by my side.”
“Still?”
“Always. I thought about you all night.” His cell phone rang loudly, and he sucked his teeth as he looked at it. My heart was doing backflips in my chest, and my mind was racing with the possibility of an us again.
“Do you need to get that? It’s ok if you do.”
“It’s my… Yeah, I should get it.”
He picked up his phone and slid the bar to answer.
“Hey.” I watched him walk out the door and pace around outside as he spoke to his… whatever.
Whatever and whoever it was. He didn’t seem to be happy.
Why was my timing always shit?
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