Page 80 of Pas de Don't
“No,” she admitted. “I thought I was in love with him. He was so kind and so sweet, and he took me to see koalas ...” She blinked the tears away and tried to pull herself together. “It’s for the best. I have a job to get back to here, and it was too soon after Jack to be anything real. It was just a rebound.”
Carly eyed her skeptically. “I don’t believe that. What if you’re just scared?” When Heather didn’t reply, Carly pressed. “You stayed with the wrong person for so long because you were scared to leave. Don’t let fear keep you from being with the right person.”
“You don’t understand. They kicked him out. His career is over because I was stupid and reckless, and I broke Peter’s rule. And I was lying to everyone again. I hid it from you, just like I did when things were bad with Jack.”
“My best friend is not stupid, so stop it,” Carly said firmly, rising from the couch to pour Heather a glass of water. “Were you being reckless,” she asked, after Heather had swallowed a few mouthfuls, “or were you doing something you really wanted for a change?”
“I—” Heather started, eyes wide. She was ready to argue, but her friend interrupted again.
“For real. Think about it. Because I don’t think you were being stupid. I don’t think you’ve ever been stupid. And okay, so you broke a rule, but it was abad rule. And you don’t always have to follow the bad rules. They’re, like, bad.”
Heather gave her a watery smile despite herself.
“I know, I should have been a lawyer, right?” Carly smirked. She looked at Heather intently. “It wasn’t really like being with Jack. Was it?”
Heather chewed her lip for a moment and thought. About Marcus’s bark of a laugh, about his apology the night he’d shown up with food from Café Luxor. About how many different ways he’d asked her what she wanted, and then given it to her. Unbegrudgingly. Enthusiastically. Because he wanted to give it to her, not because he wanted something from her.
“No, it was different,” she finally sighed. “He was different, and I was different with him.” Her eyes swam again, and she let the tears fall, too exhausted to hold them back.
“Hey, hey, it’s going to be okay,” Carly said, putting her arms around her and pulling her into a tight hug. Heather sniffed hardand let her friend hold her. “You are Heather Fucking Hays: world-class dancer, world-class friend, not quite world-class rule breaker—yet, but we can work on it.”
When Carly pulled away, Heather gave her a grateful smile. She liked the sound of all of that, just as she’d liked it when Marcus called her brave and stubborn and heart shaped. And she was different now. She was not the twenty-two-year-old corps de ballet dancer who’d been willing to wave away Jack’s unkindnesses because he made her feel special. Heather knew who she was now, and she knew the real Jack Andersen. Let her colleagues gossip all they wanted, let his mother think she was a charity case who screwed her way to the top. She knew the truth. Carly had always known it.
“I’m Heather Fucking Hays,” she said, wiping her cheeks with the backs of her hands.
“Damn right,” Carly agreed. For a moment they sat in silence, broken only by Heather’s occasional sniffles. “Maybe you can go back to ANB. And hey, maybe if Mr. K doesn’t change his mind, ANB would hireme.” Under the bravado, Heather heard the uncertainty in her friend’s voice.
“He’ll change his mind,” Heather reassured her. “And Peter won’t take me back, although he’d probably love to have you.” Smiling, she imagined Carly teaching a Thursday company class, jumping up and down and fist-pumping at the front of the room just like Alice did. Carly would fit in wonderfully at ANB.
Heather, on the other hand, had burned her bridges there, personal and professional. She’d let Peter and the whole company down. And Marcus. With a sigh, she climbed to her feet.
“I think it would suit me,” Carly mused. “But tell me the truth: is ‘taking someone to see the koalas’ Australian slang for something super dirty?”
Heather guffawed and headed for the tiny kitchen. She had just finished shoving their empty takeout containers in the trash when Carly’s phone rang, blaring the chorus of “Good as Hell” into thecramped living room. She froze and stared at Carly, who was gazing down at the screen.
“It’s him.” Carly sounded panicky, not a trace of bravado left.
“Answer it!” Heather urged. When Carly didn’t move, she waved the dishcloth at her. “Answer it! Whatever happens, remember, we’ve got a plan.”
Carly nodded, licked her lips nervously, and then reached for the phone.
When Marcus turned onto his mum’s street Sunday evening, he was unsurprised to see Davo’s ute already parked outside. He was surprised, however, to find his brother waiting for him on the front steps, Banjo sitting obediently at his feet. Davo stood as Marcus came up the front path and greeted him with a nod.
“Hi,” Marcus said warily. The last time he’d seen his brother, they’d spent a surly, silent hour cleaning up the house together and then parted without speaking.
Davo looked him up and down. “Mum told me about your job. Sucks, I’m sorry.”
“Um, thanks,” Marcus said.
“Shouldn’t be too hard to find another one, though, right?” Davo said as Banjo got to his feet and stretched. “It’s not that big a deal.”
Marcus stared at his brother.Actually, it will be hard to find another one, he wanted to say.How many national ballet companies do you think a nation has? Plus, I’m thirty-one and barely in shape and everyone knows why I was fired.If his brother had bothered to learn the first thing about Marcus’s career, about the art form he’d devoted his life to at the age of eight, he would know that this was, in fact, that big a deal.
He said none of this. He wasn’t going to let Davo get under his skin tonight. He’d done that last time, and it had blown up in his face, so tonight he’d just take deep breaths and ignore the little shards of irritation jabbing him in the gut. He gave Davo a noncommittal shrug, then made his way inside.
They found their mum in the kitchen, carefully ladling steaming pumpkin soup into bowls. She stopped when she saw them enter and hugged Davo, then Marcus.
“How are you, love?” She looked into his face, scrutinizing him with concern etched into every line of her forehead.
