Page 95 of If You Could See the Sun
“And?” Chanel prompts, totally unfazed. “What do you think?”
I hold my breath, my heart punching my ribs.
I’m only around seventy-eight percent certain how Madam Yao will respond, which, statistically speaking, isn’t the best odds. But if there’s anything I’ve learned from my time running Beijing Ghost, it’s that the people here care about reputation above all else. Reputation is currency, a source of power. The same way that money is only valuable because everyone deems it so, Airington is only consideredeliteandexclusivebecause rich parents keep wanting to send their kids here.
That would change pretty quickly if we made good on our threats.
“I think,” Madam Yao begins, her words laced with equal parts venom and resignation, “that Sun Yan here has proven just how...important she is to the Airington student body, and how much she has to say on the subject. The school board will review her and Andrew’s involvement in the kidnapping accordingly. Now, if you’ll excuse me...” The chair squeaks as she pushes back her seat and rises, straightening her already-immaculate silk blouse with a grimace. “It appears I have a few calls to make.”
And just like that, she’s off, her kitten heels clacking every step of the way to the door.
Once she leaves, the temperature in the room seems to warm by a few degrees. I stretch in my seat and exhale a long, tired breath. I hadn’t realized how tense my muscles were until now.
Andrew looks around at us hopefully. “So, uh, do you guys want to hang out for a bit or—”
“Andrew, again,you’re not part of this,” Chanel interrupts, hands on her hips. “And shouldn’t you be, like, taking this time to reflect on your actions?”
“Yeah, yeah, I know,” he grumbles, his face falling. “Kidnapping is bad. Being a criminal is rough. Never hire smart people to do your dirty work for you.”
Henry pinches the bridge of his nose. “Please just go.”
As Andrew slides out of his chair, still sulking and muttering under his breath the whole time, I turn to Henry and Chanel.
“Thank you guys so much,” I say, instantly hating how awkward I sound. “It really... It means a lot. And Chanel—I’m sorry to have messaged you so last-minute. And for kind of ghosting you these past few weeks. I swear I—”
“Alice. Oh my god.” Chanel shakes her head at me with a kind of affectionate incredulity. “We barely even did anything except flex a little.You’rethe one who came up with this whole idea and wrote the article and all that. Besides,” she adds, her voice growing serious, “it’s pretty fucked-up how the school was treating you. If I’d known earlier...”
“You couldn’t have. I didn’t want you to.”
She sighs. “Well, at least now we do. Henry and I have both been worried as hell about you, you know.” She pauses and nudges Henry, who pointedly looks away. “EspeciallyHenry. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so distracted in class before. He even answered wrong to a basic chemistry question thatIknew.”
I raise my brows, a slow smile rising to my face. “Really?”
Henry makes a low, noncommittal noise with the back of his throat. Busies himself adjusting the cuffs of his sleeves.
I won’t lie, the suit really does look good on him. It doesn’t hurt that he just threatened one of the most powerful people in Airington for my sake. And when he finally meets my gaze, crow-black curls falling just over his brows, biting his lower lip, something fills the tight space between my ribs. A lovely pain, a tender ache that feels suspiciously close to longing. Not just that, but... For the first time since our Experiencing China trip ended, I allow myself to acknowledge how much I’ve missed him.God, I’ve missed him. I somehow still do, even though he’s standing right in front of me.
I must’ve zoned out of the conversation, because the next thing I know, Chanel’s grinning at me like she can tell exactly what I’m thinking, and Henry’s saying, “Do you want to go home now?” and I feel kind of dizzy. My whole body feels overheated, like a laptop that’s been left charging for way too long. Electricity courses through my veins.
Do I want to go home now?
“No. Not yet,” I say, more sharply than I mean to. Henry tenses, his expression bemused. Chanel merely winks. “Just—just come with me.”
Without another word, I grab Henry by the wrist and lead him out the building, across the empty courtyard, and into the shelter of a small pavilion well concealed by the school gardens. Pale chrysanthemums bloom from the shadows like fresh snow, almost the same shade as the pagoda’s five tall pillars.
I push Henry against the closest one, bracketing his body with my own.
This isn’t like me at all.
My heart’s beating at twice its usual rate, and I know I’m not thinking clearly, that there’s too much adrenaline and euphoria left over in my bloodstream from the meeting, but right now, I don’t care. I trulydon’t care, and it’s kind of terrifying.
It’s also kind of thrilling.
“Okay,” I say, because I know Henry’s waiting for me to speak. To explain. “Okay, so here’s the thing: There’s no guarantee what decision the school board’s going to reach in the end, right? And there’s no guarantee when or where we’ll see each other again, or if I’ll even be allowed back on school grounds, so I just think... Well, I’ve been thinking about it for a while now, but I guess I was in denial, or just scared...” I pause, scrambling for the right words. If the right words even exist for this strange heat inside my chest. “There’s so much out of our control, but I can control what I do now, with you, or else I’ll probably kick myself for it later. You know what I mean?”
We’re standing so close that I can feel Henry’s muscles tense as I wait for his answer, hear the subtle shift in his breathing. After what seems like an excruciatingly long pause, he replies, “I...do not have the faintest clue what you’re saying.”
I bite back a frustrated sigh and look at him. Reallylookat him, at the rare hints of uncertainty mixed with amusement in his elegant features, at the slight part of his lips, the scorching black of his eyes.
