Page 35 of Scoop Me Up
He let out a little chuckle. “I don’t know. I work such long hours and my job is so unpredictable. It seems a little counterintuitive to get a pet and not spend any time with it. Why don’t you have a cat?”
“Same reason, I guess. I don’t know. I never really thought about getting a pet.”
Gabe hummed and nodded. “Maybe one day,” he murmured.
By that time, we were approaching my house, the porch lights glowing softly, the sidewalk illuminated by moonlight. Gabe leaned on the siding next to the door as I pulled my house keys out of my pocket, his eyes half closed.
“Thank you for inviting me out tonight,” he murmured. “I really needed it. I really like hanging out with you.”
“Same here.” I tried to sound light and airy, but my voice came out sounding more serious than I’d expected.
“It’s easy to hang out with you. You’re… safe. To be around, I mean.” Gabe swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing in the dim light, and inhaled sharply, his green eyes closing for a moment. It hit me all at once what was happening and I fought to suppress my internal panic.Not now. Not like this.He’d had too much to drink and if he really wanted to kiss me, I wanted the consent to be clear and sober.
With his eyes open, Gabe straightened, standing tall, and reached for me, placing a hand on my upper arm. He leaned in.
I wanted to kiss him. Wanted it more than anything I’d wanted for a long time, but I knew better. I forced myself to step back, putting space between the two of us. Every fiber of my being screamed at me that I was being an idiot, but I knew what needed to happen, and a kiss wasn’t it.
It only took a fraction of a second for Gabe to realize what I’d done. His hand dropped from my arm and he blinked a few times, his mouth drawing into a tight line. He nodded once and pulled away, putting more space between us.
“I’m sorry.” He shoved his hands in his pockets, his voice so soft I barely heard it.
I shrugged and tried to wave it off. “It’s fine. It’s late. We’re both tired.” I pushed open the door and stepped back for him to enter.
“Yeah,” was all he said before disappearing down the hallway to his bedroom, his footfalls making a slow retreat.
The moment I was alone in my own room, I closed the door, leaning forward to press my forehead against it. Eyes closed, I let out a deep, slow exhale, my heart in my throat. I stood there forwhat felt like a long time before straightening up and heading to bed.
Chapter 14
Gabe
I lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling for an eternity.What have you done?Maybe Sam wasn’t into me. Maybe I’d misread everything and they hadn’t realized how I was feeling until I tried to kiss them. In the moment, it had just felt right. Now I felt like I’d ruined everything—our budding friendship, my chance of figuring out my feelings, and probably Sam’s hospitality in letting me stay at their house, too. The thoughts pounded through my head in the same tempo as my racing heart until, eventually, I fell asleep.
The next morning, the blaring of my phone alarm woke me at far-too-early-o’clock. I checked the time—seven thirty. Okay, maybe it wasn’t too early for normal people. It was, in fact, pretty late for most people. I’d set the alarm with the intention of keeping a reasonably normal schedule over the summer, but I was regretting it now. I lay still, listening for sounds of life in the house, but heard nothing. Eventually, I forced myself to get out of bed and take care of my basic needs—bathroom, brushing my teeth, putting on clean clothes.
When I finally made my way into the kitchen, somewhere around eight, I spotted a note on the dining table.
Gabe,
Got up early for school. See you later.
Sam
That was all. Perfunctory. Direct and to the point. Basic. Unemotional.
It was the last word that hit me the hardest. Unemotional. What was Sam thinking about what I’d done the night before? Well, what I’d almost done. What they’d stopped me from doing. Maybe I’d misread the situation. Maybe they weren't into me, not even a little bit. Just because someone wasn’t straight didn’t mean they automatically wanted to hook up with every one of their preferred gender or genders.
I shook my head. That wasn’t it at all. I’d felt a connection with them. I thought I had, anyway. The touches, the glances, the joking. It felt real to me.
Maybe Iwasa fool.
I rubbed my forehead and sighed. I couldn’t spend the day in Sam’s house stewing over our near-kiss. I needed to get the hell out of there.
I headed out, making the walk to Red’s in short order. It wasn’t terribly crowded at the little diner by the time I’d arrived and I was seated at the bar, taking my place on a cracked red plastic stool at the white Formica counter. The server behind the counter placed a menu in front of me. He had a name badge that read “Mickey.”
“Hey there. I’m Mickey. What can I get started for you?”
“Coffee, please.”
