Page 66 of Pregnant By the Playboy
I don’t doubt my current feelings for Marissa, but maybe it won’t last. Yes, she’s a great woman, but maybe I feel this way mainly because she’s having my baby.
No, it’s more than that. It’s got to be.
Still, I can’t say that with absolute certainty.
Dammit.
I gulp more wine and pour myself another glass. That’s what Vince Fong does.
Yet last night, I was happily drinking mocktails.
I don’t dare tell my friends about all the planning I did for that date. I don’t tell them how I’ve been running around town, buying her every food she craves. I don’t tell them that I cried at the ultrasound.
I don’t tell them that I fear I’m unlovable, that in some ways, my cockiness is an act.
“I saw your brother the other day,” Brian says.
“Julian?”
“No. Cedric. At least, I think it was him. At a café downtown. He’s cute. I couldn’t tell from the author picture on the back of his book, but he is.”
“Don’t you dare.” It would be too weird, and I’m pretty sure Cedric isn’t into casual sex like Brian is. I’m not even sure if my brother has any interest in men, but I have reason to think he might.
Or maybe Brian doesn’t find Cedric attractive. Maybe he’s just saying this to piss me off because he’s annoyed that I’m not willing to join him in all his exploits anymore.
I finish my wine. “I should go.”
“Vince!” Brian calls after me as I hurry toward his front door, but I don’t reply.
I spend Saturday night alone, something I never, ever do.
Chapter 19
Marissa
I have a problem.
I’d heard that some women get super horny during pregnancy, particularly in their second trimester—even my own mother told me this—but I thought it wouldn’t happen to me.
Yet here I am.
I’ve already masturbated twice today to take the edge off. Nothing wrong with that, but it’s unusual for me.
For part of the first trimester, sex was far from my mind. Sort of hard to feel turned on when you’re puking and frantically trying to avoid the smell of mushrooms in the grocery store. Also, it’s hard to crave sex when you’re overwhelmed by your cravings for cheesecake.
This does not mean I never thought about sex during the first trimester. I did, especially when Vince was around.
But now, it’s a whole different story.
Sex. Sex. Sex.
I swear there’s a neon sign in my brain, flashing that single word.
And now it’s Friday, and I have another date with Vince.
I told myself I wouldn’t sleep with him yet, and I managed to restrain myself last week, even though he was so sweet and incredibly good-looking.
This time, however, I’m not sure I’ll manage it.
