Page 50 of Two Friends in Marriage
I scrub a hand over my face.“The antidepressants lower my libido.Occasionally, they also make it harder to get an erection.”
“This was a problem in your last relationship?”she correctly surmises.
“Yeah.”
She nods.“Don’t worry, I’m not constantly horny.I was for the last three days, but now that we’ve done it…”
“You’ll want to do it again, I hope?”
“Yeah, but probably not today.”
I turn onto my side, pulling her against me.“Can we stay here for a little while?”
In response, she burrows against my chest.Mostly naked, but not as a prelude to anything.It’s nice to know that this is enough for now, and I haven’t disappointed her by not being up for more sex.
People don’t always say what they mean, but I believe she was telling the truth—and it’s not because she identifies as demisexual.She rarely feels attraction, but that doesn’t mean she can’t have a high libido, and it doesn’t say anything about how much she wants sex when she does feel attraction.
She runs her fingers over my neck.
“Is there a mark?”I ask.
“Maybe a faint one?”She tilts her head.“Or not.Hard to tell without the lights on.”Morning sunlight filters through the curtains, however, and I can see her reasonably well, even if she has trouble assessing a bite mark.“What else do you like?”
“Hm?”
“I mean, in bed.So I know.For next time.”
I’m glad to hear her talk aboutnext time.
“I like and have done…lots of different things,” I say.
“You seemed to like when I bit you and pulled your hair.”
“Yes.”I pause.“I like being spanked, too.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
I exhale unsteadily, but it’s not as if I want her to spank me now, even if I look forward to it in the future.“And you?”
“I don’t like anything too rough, and I can rarely orgasm more than once, so don’t feel the need to try for multiple orgasms.”
A week ago, I wouldn’t have imagined I’d be in bed with Jane, talking about sex.But neither of us has spoken about what this means—and what it changes in our marriage.
While Jane’s in the shower, I get dressed and head downstairs.I start the coffeemaker, then debate what to do with Watson.I feel like he should have a special outfit today, but what?He’s already decked out in Mardi Gras beads, and in the past few weeks, I’ve gone through a good number of my accessories.
When I hear the water stop, I knock Watson to the ground, facedown, and set Mr.Frog on top of him.Then I head outside with our mugs of coffee.
A few minutes later, Jane steps outside in a camisole and shorts.
“What happened?”She nods toward the living room.
I shrug.“He had a busy night.”
She laughs, and I can’t help the joy that brings me.Yes, after sex and a good night’s sleep and a good morning after, I’m more relaxed than I’ve felt in a while.
“Any particular plans for the day?”I ask.
The sort of thing I might normally say.In some ways, this morning feels like all the others in our short marriage…but not quite.I reach for her free hand—the one that’s not holding her mug—and squeeze.Again, something I might have done just a few days ago.
