Page 9 of Two Friends in Marriage
“I didn’t want an engagement ring,” I explain.“We’ll just have wedding bands.”
She doesn’t have a problem accepting this, and as I sit down on the couch, I can see Evan debating whether to sit next to me or on one of the recliners.With four people on the couch, it’ll be a tight squeeze, but he seems to think it’s the right thing to do, as my fiancé.I can’t say I mind the warmth of him next to me, his hand on my knee like it was in the car.
“What do you do for work, Jane?”Kim asks.
“I’m an accountant.What about you?”
“I’m an engineer, like Max.”
Before I can say anything else, two more people enter the room, and Evan smiles and makes the introductions.Leo—who was in his final year of high school when I last saw him—and Yvonne.They’re soon followed by Jon, Evan’s youngest brother.He was much shorter the first time we met.
I feel slightly overwhelmed by this large family, so unlike my own.
I also can’t help noticing that when Leo sits down on a chair and Yvonne sits on his lap, he looks at her like she hangs the stars in the sky.It might not be obvious to everyone—his facial expressions are fairly mild—but still, I can tell.
Meeting Evan’s family has made me particularly aware of the fact that we didn’t get engaged in the normal way where we live; we didn’t fall in love.
No, we’re two rather lonely people who made a pact at the beginning of the pandemic.
“Jane?”Evan’s mom says near the end of the night.“Can you come here?”
Evan gives me an encouraging squeeze on the shoulder, and I follow Lynne into the kitchen.She hasn’t said a lot to me tonight.Evan had told me in advance that his mother is not always a big talker, so I tried not to worry about it.But my worry spikes as I approach.It’s the first time tonight that it’s been just the two of us.
“You and Evan don’t live together, so I’ll give you food separately.”
“You don’t need to…” I begin, though I appreciate this kind of mothering.It’s a novelty for me.
Lynne is going to be my mother-in-law, and as I look at her now, I can’t help comparing her to what I imagine my mom would be like, if she were still alive.
But the answer is simply: I don’t know.
I was only six when my mom died, and I can’t fully trust my memories.Plus, twenty or thirty years can really change a person.
“Are you sure you don’t want to live together first?”she asks.“It can be useful, to know if you’re compatible.”
I just stare at her.She’sencouragingus to live together before marriage?My past experience with Asian mothers did not prepare me for this possibility.
“Well, we might live together first if we buy a house before July,” I say.“But we’ve known each other a long time, even if we haven’t dated for long.I’m sure.”
I think of Leo and Yvonne and feel a sliver of doubt.Maybe I should have held out for something like that, but it seems unlikely it would have happened.
“The engagement was very surprising,” Lynne says.
“Yes, I’m sure it was.But when you know…you know.”
I hope that sounds convincing.
She nods.“My engagement was very quick, too.”
I’m not sure it would be appropriate to ask about that, so I stand there awkwardly.
“Evan says your family lives in Calgary?”
“Yes,” I reply.“My dad, my stepmom, and my half-siblings.”
“What about your mother?”
“She’s dead.”
