Page 127 of Backslide
This brings me back down to earth, helps me grab at the pieces and try to press them back together in my mind. “Nothing, CB. Go back to the party! I’m so sorry.”
She looks at Noah, looks at me. “Did something happen? Why are you fighting?”
Neither of us answer. We have sworn each other to secrecy. Noah’s lips part, like he wants to speak, but he’s likely not sure what to say. Let alone how to defend what he’s done.
Cara turns to Sabrina and Rita, who have joined the crowd of onlookers. “Why are they fighting?”
They share an unsure look. Also don’t answer.
“Someone fucking tell me what’s happening?!” Cara demands. And it is so out of character that we all go still. “Sabrina!”
“I think,” Sabrina says, shooting a tentative look at me, “they’re together.”
“Who? Noah and Nellie? They’re together?” Cara’s brow, so relaxed moments before, is now crinkled in confusion. “You’retogether?”
“Yes,” says Noah, just as I say “No!”
“Since when?” When Sabrina doesn’t answer, Cara shoots her another commanding look. She is not suffering fools.
“Since the day they skipped the booze bus, I think,” Sab mumbles, avoiding my eyes.
But I’m not mad at her. I’d rather she betray me than the un-bride.
“But that was days ago,” Cara says, puzzling it all together. She turns her gaze on me. “You didn’t tell me. I kept apologizing for sending you on those errands together. I kept checking in when you were stuck in the storm. And you never said a thing.”
I open my mouth to apologize, the crushing weight of my mistakes rooting me to the spot. Paralyzing me. But before I can speak, Cara cocks her head and says, “What about Alfie?”
I clear my throat. I glance at Sabrina and Rita. I glance at Noah. Even Damien. They’re all watching me expectantly. “Um. We broke up,” I say, quietly. “Over a month ago.”
“Broke up?” The hurt on Cara’s face is undeniable. It’s like something vibrant has gone out of her as she frowns. “Why wouldn’t you tell me?”
And when I look into my best friend’s face, her earnest bewilderment reflected in every angle, no viable excuse presents itself. So I tell her the truth: “I don’t know.”
“We’re supposed to be best friends,” Cara says. She looks from me to Sabrina, her eyes welling.
“I’m sorry,” I say, as Sabrina mumbles the same.
“I don’t know why I planned this stupid trip,” Cara says, shaking her head. “It was obviously a mistake. Do whatever the fuck you want. I’m done.” And then she rushes away, Ben close behind her.
He glances back from the top of the stairs, shooting us a disappointed look. Me most of all.
Sabrina sighs, her eyes downcast.
“I guess I should have told her,” I murmur.
“Which part?” Sabrina asks, a sharp tone to her voice.
“I don’t know. All of it.”
She huffs impatiently. “Yeah, I think a lot could have been avoided if you were just honest.”
“I didn’t want to make this trip about me.”
Sabrina looks at me, her own anger playing on her face. “Yeah? How’s that going?”
She shakes her head and stalks off, too.
27NOAHTODAY
