Page 93 of Isn't It Obvious?
Yael nods, wiping at her eyes with the knuckles of her thumbs before heading back to the library.
Never has she more strongly wished she was a better actor than during tonight’s book club. It’s honestly brutal. She knew she’d get more than one “Where’s Ravi?” Of course she would. But she didn’t know it would feel like this.
When Jaxon and Eli join the circle, Jaxon becomes the fifth person to say some variation of “Ms. Lopez? What are you doing here?”
“You all could at least pretend you’re not so disappointed to see me,” Gina says, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “I could be on my couch right now.”
“Why do you look sad, Ms. Koenig?” Eli asks. “Did you and Ravi break up?”
Yael was not prepared forthat. She’s mostly sure he’s joking, but she still struggles to form a response quickly.
As she starts to stammer through a denial, Gina fixes a stern look on Eli. “Eli, how are you getting home today?”
“Uh,” Eli says, rightfully trepidatious. “My mom is picking me up.”
Gina’s lips slide into a smile. “Great. Should I have a conversation with her about you making invasive jokes about your teachers?”
Eli’s cheeks tinge red. “No, Ms. Lopez. I’m sorry, Ms. Koenig,” he mumbles, taking his seat.
“Thank you,” Yael says, looking from him to Gina. It probably doesn’t reflect well on her that someone else had to step in, but she can’t bring herself to care.
None of the other students try her after that. They discuss their last lingering thoughts onCamp Damascus; Yael doles out copies ofThe Lesbiana’s Guide to Catholic Schoolandeven manages to convince Gina to join them for the read-aloud.
It’s a relief when the time is up and they all file out. Leo takes a long time to pack up, and Yael wonders if he’ll come up to her like he so often does to Ravi. She hopes she’d be able to handle it, but in her state, she’s not sure she could. When he makes eye contact with her, she offers a smile. He hesitates for a moment, but ultimately decides against approaching Yael, instead filing out the door after Zoe.
“Alright,” Gina says, “are you feeling like beer, wine, or something else?”
“I want a margarita the size of my head,” Yael says.
“Done.” Gina links her arm through Yael’s and walks them out to her car.
Gina doesn’t say anything for the ride over, and Yael is glad for it. Instead, Yael spends her time cataloging everything in the car, all these bits of Gina she’s never seen. There’s a half-burned stick of palo santo next to a vape pen in the compartment with the USB plugs below the dashboard, colorful pom-poms strung like the trans Pride and Costa Rican flags dangling from the rearview mirror, a teased blond wig in the back seat. It’s a privilege to be let in like this, Yael knows. She only wishes she felt good enough to truly enjoy it.
They get out at a nearby Mexican restaurant that Yael hasn’t been to in a long while—the food is good but not fabulous, but the drinks are great. They end up in a booth in the back corner, and Gina offers Yael the seat with the view of the whole restaurant.
“So, now that we aren’t at our literal jobs,” Gina says after the waiter drops off their waters and menus, “what the fuck happened between you and Kevin-slash-Ravi?”
“It’s a really long story, and I’m worried I’ll cry,” Yael says. “Are you sure you want to hear it?”
The corners of Gina’s lips turn down. “Yael, I thought you were joking earlier when you said that thing about being only a work friend. Were you not?”
“I was mostly joking,” Yael mumbles. “I know you like to keep things separate.”
“How many other Kennedy faculty members do you think I’ve invited to a Maiden Oregon show?”
“Uh,” Yael says.
“Fucking zero, that’s how many. Don’t think I didn’t notice that you didn’t come back. You like to keep things separate, too, boo.”
Yael’s lips part, surprised. “You didn’t keep inviting me,” she says. “I didn’t think you’d want me to.”
Gina rolls her eyes. “Jesus, sometimes I forget you’re still in your twenties.”
“Barely,” Yael says.
“Enough that you’d think something like that. I made it clear that the shows are every other Friday. You know, sometimes having low self-regard becomes rude,” Gina says. “I seek you out at work, Yael. I tell you my personal business. I’m not exactly in the habit of pretending in order to spare someone’s feelings. Ask Principal Harrison.”
“I’m sorry,” Yael says. “I’m a little ashamed I didn’t realize.”
