Page 48 of This Ravenous Fate
Had her life not been firmly rooted to the ground she currently stood on, Elise would have agreed. It felt impossible to imagine this place without spite. Once they stood among the crowd, watching Mr. Arendale take the stage, Elise whispered back, “He wants to fix racism. Is it possible for a country built on the backs of others to ever consider those others as human? As more than tools to be used and discarded until we’re needed again? The chances of a country conceived out of bigotry reconciling with justice…”
Sterling shook his head. “Never.”
“I want a brighter future for everyone.” Mr. Arendale’s voice rang out. He stood on the dais in the middle of the square, eyes gleaming with ambition. “No one should live beneath the feet of others. As mayor, delivering equality to everyone will be my priority.” Mr. Arendale raised his fist in the air. Several shouts rang out from the crowd.
“No more gangsters!”
“Eliminate all reapers!”
Elise anticipated fear from these individuals, but their angry voices seared through her.
Her father pressed into her side then, his knuckles brushing the back of her wrist. “Listen closely, Elise.”
Elise looked out over the overly white crowd that appeared before the mayoral candidate. Some were Greenwich Village art types—people whose eyes never focused on one thing in sight. People who walked right from their projects to join the rally with paint still on their faces and flour still dashed on their clothing. Elise could imagine them passing around papers detailing their wishes for new legislation in the park during the evenings. Here, art and radicalism mixed, creating an environment of stifling want.
“Imagine ripping away the tiny shreds of hope all these people still manage to hold. You don’t want that to dissipate, do you, Elise?” her father asked.
The crowd roared as Mr. Arendale continued to speak, but it was merely a murmur in Elise’s ears. She could only focus on her father and the severity in his tone. “No, Father,” she said strongly.
“Then why was one of Harlem’s most prosperous businesses shut down after your visit? Another reaper attack left in your wake and all you’ve created is more paranoia,” Mr. Saint hissed.
Elise took a deep breath. Her heart pounded so hard, she felt it in her ears, her temples, her arms. She wanted to leave; have this conversation in private, without the increased pressure of the crowd around them. All she could do was sweat while her father picked outevery anxiety in her until she was more fear than person. She glanced up as Mr. Arendale said something that made the crowd laugh. “You will be happy to know that Layla and I have made a plan that involves Mr. Wayne. He is bound to lead us in the right direction.”
“So you are going behind my back. Stephen is a very busy man, Elise. We are here to support him, not distract him,” her father said coolly.
“I thought you would be happy to know.” Elise swallowed.
Her father’s expression turned cold. His mouth twitched, as if to keep back an aggravated smile, and he locked his jaw while he stared down at Elise. “Happy?” A shadow passed over his eyes and Elise’s heart stopped. “If you are vying for my happiness rather than your success, Elise, then you have already failed. The success of performers relies on applause and pride. But you are no longer a performer. You are a Saint.” He leaned closer to her when Analia Saint glanced over, concerned. “Do you think I accept awards when I eliminate reapers? No. Do not fall victim to the false god that is pride.Do better.”
In a split second, that mask of honed anger was gone. Mr. Saint leaned back, his relaxed smile returned. Elise dug her teeth into her bottom lip and willed her trembling body to still.
The rally carried on while Elise felt like the world was slipping from beneath her feet. Mr. Arendale spoke so smoothly, without a single doubt attached to his words. Elise could not imagine having that level of confidence. To speak, knowing everyone listened, to act, knowing those who watched were judging not his appearance, butthe content of his character. To exist as the sole owner of his freedom.
“The Negro community is just as influential as ours. And we must unite if we want to see proper change,” Mr. Arendale exclaimed.
Mr. Saint applauded with the crowd and his smile stretched even wider. Elise swallowed past a lump in her throat.
Elise could not brush away her fears; not when one of them stood right beside her. She thought of Layla in the garden the other week, her eyes filled with concern. Even if she had not shown it, Elise had felt it. And yet Elise had not been able to answer Layla’s question, about what Elise feared with her father.He won’t what?the reaper had asked.
He won’t trust me, he won’t see my worth, he won’t love me. And then what good am I? What purpose do I serve?
The back of her eyes burned. Elise pressed her hands into her face, breathing hard. She was a fool. For how could she make him happy—how could she make anyone happy, or proud, when she could not even satisfy herself?
A gentle hand rubbed her shoulder, then Sterling’s voice was in her ear. “Just a few more minutes. It’s painfully boring here, I know.”
Elise wanted to cry. She wasn’t bored, she was exhausted. No one around her had seen that but Layla.A reaper had seen right into her.
She lowered her hands and stared ahead, right into the setting sun.
For so long, Elise assumed reapers bereft. They were stretched beyond their life expectancies, forced to contend with parts of their life that they would never get back, and denied the privilege of even experiencing a natural death. Reapers lived without the breath oflife, eternal sinners trapped in agony.
They lived for no one but themselves.
Elise would never know what that was like.
***
Something burrowed in the back of Layla’s mind. It bothered her so much, she eventually had to tear out the hair tie that held up her bun, letting her long curls bounce freely across her back so her head stopped throbbing. Not much relief came from the change, but she pushed a curl back from her face and continued perusing through Valeriya’s various books, looking for anything at all about reapers turning back into humans.
