Page 24 of Did My Love Life Shrink in the Wash?
‘You are coming back, right?’ he asks.
‘Of course.’
I’m supposed to return in the new year but the thought alone is exhausting. There’s so much to prepare. I need to find a decent breast pump, finalise childcare and remember how to spell my name.
‘You alright, mate?’ he asks, hearing my low spirits.
‘Tell me I’m fun and interesting.’
‘You’re fun and interesting. Go knock ’em dead. Do you need any jokes to break the room?’
‘Your jokes? No thanks.’
He laughs. ‘Enjoy, I’ll catch you laters. My dinner’s ready. COMING, MUM! Love you, Callaghan.’
The line goes dead and returns to a screensaver of Joe. My little boy looks up at me. Speaking to Sean brings all my thoughts and guilt-laced emotions about returning to work to the forefront. I could bring Joe into school and feed him in between lessons, keep him in a drawer. If we passed him through every department for a five-minute cuddle session, that would see me through most of the days. A tap on my shoulder gets my attention. It’s an impossibly tall blond man with a very severe haircut but excellent taste in Japanese graphic T-shirts.
‘Do you want a smoke?’
I was introduced to this man half an hour ago. Balls. My mind is like a sieve. Oh, he’s Magnus with the shocked-looking baby.
‘I don’t. I just came to check on my baby,’ I say, waving my phone in the air.
‘Oh, the adorable Joe.’
‘You have a baby, yes?’
‘Agnes. She’s two months.’
‘Is she sleeping much? Ours doesn’t sleep.’
‘No, she reminds me of my teenage self. Party all night, sleep all day, eat everything,’ he says.
‘Did you poo all over the sofa too at that age?’
He laughs but sees my gaze caught by Sam and Will through the window. She’s incredibly tactile with him and my boyfriend doesn’t seem to mind.
‘Don’t worry about Sam, she’s like that,’ Magnus says. ‘She likes to pet her newcomers. That was me once.’
‘What is she like, as a boss?’ I ask.
‘Oh, she’s an architectural genius. I’ve known her for years but her genius comes with sharp edges. She likes to wield her power, work us hard. She hasn’t got to where she’s got by playing nice, if that makes sense?’
I am not sure what to make of that statement so nod politely. I was never very sure what an architect did when I first met Will. I just thought they built stuff, thought maybe he could build us a house out of shipping containers like onGrand Designs. He was passionate about it; he would get angry at poor design and work his arse off to reach deadlines. We always had nice pens in our house, too.
Magnus puffs hard on his cigarette. I gave up smoking three years ago but man, sometimes I just like to hang around the smell. The scent of a youth filled with cheeky cigs on the pavement, trying to look cool and feel better about the world.
‘What’s rillettes?’ he asks me.
‘I have no idea.’
‘I’m eating one. Can I sit next to you in case it’s something weird like the French word for a tongue or a kidney or something?’
‘Only if I use your shoulder for a nap?’
He shakes my hand. ‘This also saves me from having to sit next to Philip.’
‘I’m sorry, who?’
