Page 13 of Great Sexpectations
‘That is some ring. That was you, wasn’t it?’ she says, squinting her eyes at me.
‘I’ll never tell…’
‘God, your mum and dad must be so excited. They love a wedding…’
‘Well, I have no doubt you’ll be on the guest list, so you’ll be able to see for yourself.’
Michelle jumps out of her seat, dancing, spilling tea all over her cleavage. ‘Oh my days, I’ll have to ring Jeff. But look at me… I’m such a div.’
The one thing about Michelle is that she adheres to her own special dress code at work, which means her boobs are usually displayed in quite a fashion. You can’t miss those bad boys. I lean over with a tissue and attempt to help mop her down as the office door opens.
‘Crikey…’ yells Charlie, pretending to look away. ‘I’m sorry, I should have knocked.’
‘It’s all right, Charlie,’ I say, laughing. ‘Michelle just spilled her tea.’
He creeps his head around the door with one eye open, his face a deep blush. Charlie came to us at sixteen, keen as mustard to learn about business, slightly cocky, though, with all the sexual experiences he’d shared with a handful of girls in the backs of cars, thinking he’d seen it all. The butt plug section of our store changed that. He now often wanders around here with his hi-vis and trainers looking like he’s just stepped into Narnia. I like Charlie’s enthusiasm, his work ethic and excellent manners. We need to have words about his shiny Ronaldo haircut, though.
‘Josie, I’ve been told that delivery will come in around half an hour and you said you wanted to check it when it came through, so I thought I’d give you the heads-up,’ he informs me.
‘Nipple clamps?’
‘No, those came in last night. It’s the lube consignment?’
I nod and put a thumbs up.
‘Yes, last time it squirted all over the place and—’
Michelle tries hard to keep in her giggles.
Charlie sputters. ‘I mean, it was summer and too warm. All the bottles shot their… I mean…’
I grin broadly. ‘Charlie, I’ll be down in a bit. Can you make sure we have the inventory printed out and we can go through it together?’
He nods. ‘I also have those forms for that management course you told me to look up. I need some help with the bursary questions if that’s OK?’
‘Sure thing. Did you enjoy the party at the weekend?’
He shuffles in through the door fully, obviously keen to share his experiences. ‘It were lit. I’ve never experienced anything like it.’
‘How come he got an invite?’ Michelle grumbles.
‘He did some waiter work for us, dressed as a very convincing werewolf.’
‘What did you and your mate come as then? I didn’t get that,’ he asks.
God, I’m only about six years older than this one, but his lack of filmic knowledge tells me all I need to know.
‘I was a Ghostbuster.’
‘Oh yeah, the film thing. That’s retro. Who was your mate? He was a nice bloke.’
Michelle suddenly turns on the spot. ‘She went with a date? Now this you kept quiet, spill. Charlie, you too.’
Charlie freezes on the spot as Michelle raises her voice and points a finger at him.
‘It wasn’t a date,’ I say.
‘But you had matching outfits?’ Charlie adds.
