Page 82 of Great Sexpectations
‘Yes, but they can’t be climbing trees all the time,’ Dr Sara intervenes. ‘In the real world, it’s important for children to learn about themselves, their bodies and their truth.’
‘Their truth? We tell kids that a fairy comes and collects their old teeth in the middle of the night. There are some things that children do not need to know at such a young age,’ Henry continues.
I was right about Henry. He likes to talk out of his backside, a backside no woman has touched for many years. He’s entitled to his opinion but it’s the nastiness with which he projects all his words.
‘Do you have children? Can I ask when and how your children found out about sex then?’ Mum asks. It’s the first thing she’s said and I can hear a shake in her voice. Steady on, Mum. He does have children. You spent Christmas Day with one of them.
‘I do have children. I have four. That’s a private matter,’ Henry replies, not even looking my mother in the eye.
‘It’s a simple question,’ my mum says. ‘My children found out about sex in the last years of primary school when their bodies were changing, probably more from the school playground too, and I think that’s where we’re failing kids today.’
I found out because she bought me a book calledWhy Am I Growing Hair There?It was a pop-up book. Sonny and I used to open up the pages to the people with the pubes, roll around the carpet and laugh. Henry squirms in his seat to hear Mum talk so casually about these matters.
‘Children have no idea how their bodies work and what’s happening to them. We hide so much: menstruation, body change, sexuality, sexual urges,’ she continues.
‘For good reason,’ Henry pipes in.
‘For no good reason. We hide it away and then people associate shame with those things.’
YES, MUM! I hope Dad is watching this and he is crying with pride. We didn’t bring him down today for that very reason.
‘Tell us more about what your charity does, Mrs Jewell,’ the presenter asks.
‘Please call me Susie. It’s INTI-MATE. I go into schools and talk about sex, consent, relationships. Important things, so young people understand more than just what’s being taught through health education and biology.’
‘And I do believe you also are connected to sex in other ways?’ the presenter presses. Oh dear.
‘Oh, I used to run a business…’ I see her glance into the shadows, looking for me.
‘A sex shop. And what about before that?’ Henry asks condescendingly. He may be a late call-in, but he’s definitely done his homework.
Mum pauses for a moment. ‘Before that, I used to work in the adult film industry.’
Henry chortles under his breath and looks over to Dr Sara. ‘In that case,’ he says, ‘I am not sure she is the right person to be sitting on a panel like this. Someone who has worked in one of the most exploitative, sordid industries preaching to us about sex education? It’s laughable.’
He doesn’t look my mother in the eye the whole time he says this and my heart aches.
‘Well,’ replies Mum, ‘maybe I’m someone who has worked at the heart of an industry where I can say I’ve seen how messages about sex can be warped. Maybe I’m actually the most qualified person here to be talking about these things.’
You are, Mum.
‘Well, no. If she has a sex business, then obviously she is here with vested interests. She wants people to know about sex so they can buy her paraphernalia,’ he says, directing his words to the host of the show.
‘Sex toys, Henry. They’re called sex toys. Let me know if I can hook you up.’
Dr Sara is laughing, so is the cameraman next to me. I know an excellent line of cock rings I could send to his house, extra small.
Henry’s nostrils are flared and I recognise this look. It’s a woman, taking him down, taking him on. ‘So, if we are looking at this curriculum, you think it’s appropriate for children to learn about “homosexuality”, “masturbation”, words like “vulva”?’ He spits these words out like he’s allergic to them.
‘Yes. I do. Because maybe then they won’t have such antiquated opinions of these things as they grow up.’
‘YES!’ I squeal. The set stops as I step back into the shadows.
I see my mum’s smug face to have used her new word. ‘Basic sex education is something kids will carry for a lifetime. It’s something my charity will always endorse and support.’
Henry stops to hear those words as very possibly, just before Christmas, someone said the exact same thing to him around his dining table. ‘Well, not if I have anything to do with it. I’ve made my views known in the Commons. The reason we’ve lost control of the youth of today is because they are sexualised far too quickly. I mean, look at someone like you…’
He finally looks at my mother. Dr Sara freezes and I glare at the presenter to step in.
