Page 44 of Puck Your Feelings
My chest feels tight. Too tight. Like someone's wrapped duct tape around my ribs and keeps pulling it tighter.
I can't breathe.
No, that's not right.
I'm breathing.
In and out.
Mechanical.
Controlled.
Except I don't feel controlled. I feel like I'm falling apart, piece by piece, and there's nothing I can do to stop it.
ESPN alert on my watch:Kane's Family Drama Exposed in Viral Podcast Moment.
I rip the watch off and throw it after my phone.
My head is buzzing.
Footsteps on the stairs. Running. Fast. Getting closer.
No. Absolutely not. I don't want to see anyone right now, least of all—
"Kane!"
Becker rounds the corner, out of breath and wild-eyed, and skids to a stop when he sees me on the floor.
"Jayden," he tries again, softer. "I am so, so fucking sorry. I didn't mean—"
"You didn't mean to what?" My voice comes out cold. Flat. The opposite of what I'm feeling inside. "Violate my privacy for content?"
"It was an accident." He takes a step closer, hands up like I'm a spooked animal. "I was recording in the cabin. I didn't know you were outside. I didn’t—"
"An accident." I stand, my legs shaky but functional. "Right. Like how youaccidentallymade me part of your podcast without asking. Like how youaccidentallyturned my first day here into a viral moment."
"That's not—" His face crumbles. "Kane, that's not fair."
"Fair?" The word comes out sharp. "You want to talk about fair? My father thinks I did this intentionally. That I'm trying to embarrass him publicly."
Becker flinches. "I'll take it down. Right now. I'll delete everything and post an apology—"
"It's too late, Becker." I can hear my voice rising, losing that careful control. "It's already out there. People have downloaded it. Clipped it. It's on Twitter, YouTube, probably fucking TikTok by now. You can't un-ring that bell."
"Then let me fix it—"
"You can't fix this!" I'm shouting now, and some distant part of me registers that I never shout. Never lose control like this. "Do you have any idea what you've done? That conversation was private. It wasmine. And now it's entertainment for people who don't even know me."
"I know." His voice cracks. "I know, and I'm so fucking sorry. I would never— If I'd known you were there, if I'd checked the audio before posting—"
"But you didn't check. You just posted it. Because that's what you do, right? Everything's content. Everything's material for the podcast."
"That's not true."
"Isn't it?" I take a step toward him, and he actually backs up. Good. "You’re a fucking mess, Becker. Everywhere you go, you brig nothing but chaos."
"Kane—"
