Page 19 of A Baxter Family Christmas
Maddie thought about that for a long moment. How Hayley was able to attend school and read and even polish silver. “They thought she’d never get out of bed?” Why hadn’t she known this before? “I keep wishing God would help her. I didn’t know... He already has.”
“Well... now you know.” Her mom smiled. “Let’s pray.”
Maddie nodded. This was something they hadn’t done together in a long time. She and her mom held hands and prayed—that Maddie would feel God’s peace, and that she would know the reality of Hayley’s still-unfolding miracle.
When they finished, her mom stood. “I’m glad we talked.”
“Me, too.” Maddie remembered to smile. If only she felt better. “Love you, Mom.”
“Love you more.” She put her hand alongside Maddie’s face and then she left.
The talk with her mother should’ve made Maddie feel less guilt about Hayley. But it didn’t. That night as she fell asleep she thought about all God had done to heal her sister. How differently her life might have turned out if the doctors had been right. But she was still plagued by the reality—the fact that Hayley wouldn’t have been injured at all if Maddie had only done her part. The details she hadn’t shared. Because she still couldn’t tell her mother the truth.
Let alone Connor Flanigan.
The thought of him made her smile. A dreamy kind of smile she’d never known before. It felt so good to be with him, to laugh with him. If she could, she’d hang out with him every day. But she couldn’t.
Not now. Not ever.
Which meant that when Connor returned from Liberty for Christmas break, Maddie would have to do a better job of keeping her distance.
Because a lifetime would never be long enough to pay the price for what she’d done to Hayley.
Even if back then Maddie had only been a little girl.
CHAPTER SEVEN
An icy wind made its way through Bloomington the Sunday after Thanksgiving, but it didn’t stop Ashley and Landon and their kids from making their way to Lander’s Tree Farm just outside town. The place where most of the Baxters went each year to pick out Christmas trees for their respective homes.
Ashley and Landon led their family to the lobby first, where Kari and Ryan and their children were already holding two tables. Kari stood and hugged Ashley. “It’s freezing out there.”
“I told her to stay in here.” Cole nodded to his uncle Ryan. “The men can get the trees this year.” He grinned. “After hot chocolate, that is.”
Ashley kept her scarf and gloves in place. “Might be a good idea.”
Ryan and Landon and Cole left the table and got in line. Hot chocolate and home-baked cookies were part of the tradition. Ashley took the seat next to Kari, as Amy and Devin and Janessa squeezed in between Kari’s kids.
“Have you heard from Luke?” Kari kept her voice low. “I don’t think he’s coming today.”
“It’s a hike.” Ashley didn’t want to believe their brother’s absence was because of the Christmas Eve decision. “Twice here from Indianapolis in one weekend.”
“They did it last year.” Kari frowned. “I just hate the tension. Especially from him.”
“I know.” Ashley caught Amy watching from across the table. She dropped her voice a level. “Let’s talk about it later.”
Their father and Elaine entered the lobby. Like the others, they were bundled in winter gear. John unwrapped his scarf from his face as he approached them. “More snow in the forecast. Could be the coldest winter in a long time.”
“Perfect for getting a Christmas tree.” RJ grinned at his cousin Devin. “Plus we’re mountain men. We’re used to the cold.”
“Exactly.” Devin was a year younger than RJ, but both of them were in third grade at Clear Creek Elementary School. “I like Cole’s idea. Girls stay inside and keep warm. Us boys can do the work.”
“But what if we want to help pick out the tree?” Amy giggled at the boys. “Every mountain man needs a mountain woman.”
Brooke and Peter and their girls arrived and after everyone had hot chocolate and cookies, they set out together to find their trees. The wind had died down so no one stayed behind. As the group set out, Ashley and Landon trailed along behind the others.
“Doesn’t he get it?” Ashley felt her frustration rise to the surface again. “He didn’t even ask about Luke. Which just isn’t normal.”
Landon eased his arm around her waist as they walked. “He’s just enjoying the day, Ash. The rest of us are here.”
