Page 63 of Someone Like You
“Thanks.” Louise smiled at her. “I’m glad you like it.”
The two were getting closer every day. Maddie had no idea what that meant for the future, but it felt right for now. She returned to cleaning the next empty table. Her words stayed with her.We need another location. We… as if she were staying here forever with Louise, working at the coffee shop the way her sister had. As if a job—and her family—weren’t waiting for her back home.
Wherever home was.
She collected the crumbs and spilled cream from the surface of the table and tried to imagine what the future held. Was she really staying here? Would she and Dawson ever talk about the attraction between them? Her mind was spinning.
Before she could move to the next dirty table, she felt someone walk up behind her. It took a single heartbeat to realize who it was. Maddie gasped and jumped back. “Connor.”
“Hi.” He wore familiar jeans and a sweater, but something was different about him. Where confidence once prevailed, Connor’s eyes were full of fear. “I had to see you. So we could talk face-to-face.” He shrugged. “I flew in an hour ago.”
Maddie felt her heart melt. Her fiancé had come all the way here to talk? She dropped the wet rag in the bucket again. Connor deserved this conversation. It wasn’t something Maddie wanted to have, but it was overdue. The way she’d been treating him wasn’t fair. “Hold on.”
She took the pail behind the counter and found Louise at the coffee bar. “I have to go. My … fiancé is here.” Maddie hesitated. “The two of us … we need to talk.”
Louise had listened to Maddie talk about her conflicted feelings for Connor every night for the past week. Ever since Maddie decided to open up to the woman. Louise put her hand on Maddie’s shoulder. “Go, dear. Take your time.”
Maddie took off her green London Coffee apron and hung it on a hook. Then she grabbed her purse and joined Connor by the door. “Okay.” Their eyes met, but Maddie looked away. How had it come to this between them? She didn’t smile. “Where are you parked?”
Connor held the door for her, like he always did. But today things felt more than a little off between them. Maddie had wondered how they would feel when they were in person again. Their phone calls had been so awkward, she could hardly wait to hang up.
Clearly he felt the same way.
“There’s a park in Vancouver, just across the river.” Connor kept his focus on the road. “I thought we could go there.”
Neutral territory, Maddie thought to herself. “Sounds good.”
They didn’t talk again until they sat at a picnic table near the fountain at Esther Short Park. The sound of the water filled the painful silence between them. Connorstraddled the table bench and she did the same, facing him.
Only then did he let loose a long sigh. He took her hands and ran his thumb over her engagement ring. “What’s going on, Maddie?” He searched her eyes.
Maddie’s heart pounded. She looked down at the place where their hands were connected. It was another warm day, the sun bright overhead. But Maddie’s shoulders were shaking, like it was thirty degrees. She shook her head. “I’m not … I’m not sure.”
“Please … will you look at me.” He waited until she met his gaze. “I love you, Maddie. You’re my fiancée. But on the phone”—he sounded beyond concerned—“it’s like we just met.”
Tears welled up and spilled onto her face. She couldn’t speak, couldn’t voice the truth. A truth she hadn’t admitted even to herself.
“What is it?” Connor’s voice was kind. Always. “I’m here, baby. Everything’s okay. Just talk to me.”
Dawson might not be someone she would ever date, but he had brought to light her feelings for Connor. The lack of feelings. And now … with her fiancé sitting across from her, she had no choice but to deal with that.
“I wonder …” Tears saturated her tone. “I wonder, Connor, if maybe we were only supposed to be friends. The two of us.”
Connor looked like maybe he’d been expecting this. “You’re confused. That’s all.” He studied her. “That’s why I had to come. So you could remember who you are. Who we are.”
“I know.” Maddie gulped back a few quiet sobs. “That’s what I want. Believe me.” She pressed her hand to herheart. “But it’s not what I feel.” She told him everything she knew. That before finding out about being adopted, she had been completely sure about marrying him. “I never would’ve said yes, otherwise.”
“Nothing has changed.” The sun moved behind a lone cloud. Connor looked deep into her eyes, like he was trying to find the girl she used to be. “You’re spinning out of control. I can see that. But I’m not only your past, Maddie. I’m your future.”
The words sounded nice, but they didn’t hit their mark. Here, with him sitting so close, she was even more sure of her heart. She shook her head. “I’m sorry, Connor.” Fresh tears blurred her view of him. “I can’t stay engaged to you. Nothing is the same.” She covered her eyes with her hand and let the sobs come.
“Hey.” Connor slid closer and took Maddie in his arms. For a long time they stayed that way. Clinging to what was left of their love. “It’s okay, Maddie. We’ll get through this.”
When her tears finally let up, she used the sleeve of her sweatshirt to dry her face. “I don’t know who I am, Connor. That’s the problem.”
He cradled her head against his shoulder for another few minutes. Then he faced her. “If you don’t want to marry me, I can accept that.” The anguish in his eyes was matched only by his determination. His voice rose a notch. “But you know who you are, Maddie.”
Maddie wiped her face again. She could feel how swollen her eyelids were, but she didn’t look away. “I don’t know.”
