Page 50 of Idol Lives
Jason chuckled, the sound hollow and devoid of humor. “Yeah, that’s me. The asshole.” He shrugged, but his nonchalance looked forced. “Always have been. Everybody knows that.”
Tae Hyun groaned, his frustration mounting. “Just because you know you’re an asshole doesn’t make it okay.”
Jason’s eyes narrowed. “Is that how it is?” He turned to face Tae Hyun, a dangerous anger smoldering behind his eyes. “Fine. Then let’s talk about your new best friend, Ren, and how much of an asshole he was to me.”
Tae Hyun’s chest tightened. He didn’t want to fight, not with Jason. But he couldn’t back down now, either. “That’s not fair. I have to work with Ren. We’ve still got another dozen shows together.”
“Not fucking fair?” Jason’s harsh snort matched his suddenly forceful tone. “Let me tell you what’s not fair. That man tried to kiss you. And you didn’t tell me until the shit hit the fan. That makes me think maybe you wouldn’t have ever told me otherwise.” He downed the last of his bourbon in a single gulp. “Which is fine. It’s your fucking life. You don’t have to share every detail with me.”
“I would’ve told you,” Tae Hyun quietly admitted against the backdrop of the city’s hum. His guilt clawed at him. “It only just happened.”
“I said it’s fine.” Jason pushed off the railing, his movements sharp and agitated. He poured another generous measure of bourbon, the clink of crystal against glass piercing thetense silence. “It’s not like you tried to kiss him, right?” He swallowed half the bourbon in one go. “But then you defended him. You stood up for him to me.” His tone grew knife-edged. “To me, Tae Hyun. As if my asking him about the tabloid shit was somehow out of line. Do you really care that much about what he thinks?”
Tae Hyun had no good answer for that. The correct answer would’ve been no. But the truth was messier, tangled up in his guilt and an unsettling sense of obligation towards Ren. Maybe he did care that much. But that didn’t make Jason’s behavior okay, either. “I don’t know,” he mumbled. “Maybe.”
Jason’s heavy sigh settled like a weight on his shoulders. He stared into the swirling depths of his glass, then downed the rest. “You really need to figure out what’s important to you, Tae Hyun. Because right now, I’m not so sure it’s me.” He grabbed the bottle and stalked towards the door, his shoulders tight with tension.
“Where are you going?” Tae Hyun asked, wishing he hadn’t sounded so desperate.
Jason stopped, his back to Tae Hyun. “I’m tired,” he said, flat and humorless. “I’m going to bed.”
Tae Hyun stood frozen as Jason disappeared into the suite, the city lights blurring into a kaleidoscope of colors that matched the storm of conflicting emotions raging within him. Anger at Jason’s cold dismissal wrestled with a deep sense of guilt. He loved Jason fiercely, loved him more than anything in the world. But this wasn’t the first time Jason’s hotheadedness had caused him trouble. He’d been thrilled when Jason said he was coming, relieved to have him by his side for this mess, but the old patterns were already resurfacing.
Tae Hyun wanted to shout, hurl accusations,and demand the support he craved. But maybe that was unfair. Jason had been through a lot, too, dealing with his parents’ deaths and a corporate takeover. He was probably just as exhausted and overwhelmed as Tae Hyun. But that didn’t excuse his behavior.
Tae Hyun’s shoulders slumped, the weight of the unresolved conflict finally settling upon him. He longed for understanding. For comfort. For Jason to recognize how much he, too, was hurting. But all he felt was a bone-deep weariness and a longing for the simplicity of a life that seemed so far away.
15
The treadmill wasn’t working. Well, not exactly. It was functioning as expected but wasn’t producing the results Jason wanted. Usually, his morning runs were a form of meditation to clear his head and find his center. But the steady thump of his feet against the machine did nothing to chase away his demons. His usual therapeutic routine felt hollow, a futile attempt to escape his inner turmoil. At least the penthouse’s private gym offered a break from the emotional wreckage he’d left in the suite. So, he pushed himself harder, the sweat stinging his eyes as he tried to outrun the anger, frustration, and, unfortunately, the guilt that clung to him like a second skin.
Naturally, Jason’s thoughts kept returning to Tae Hyun. The events of the previous evening replayed in his mind, a montage of raised voices, accusatory stares, and Tae Hyun’s heartbroken expression. He hadn’t seen Tae Hyun since waking up, having slept in one of the suite’s spare bedrooms, using the space as a physical barrier against the words he feared he’d regret. He’d been a jerk. A jealous fool. He knew it. But the raw sting of betrayal refused to fade.
Jason glanced at the phone sitting on the treadmill’s control panel. The urge to call Naomi was almost overwhelming. Shewas the one constant in his chaotic life, the voice of reason he desperately needed, especially when it came to matters of the heart. But things were different now. He’d already dumped an avalanche of responsibility on her shoulders. Did he really have the right to ask for help with his love life anymore?
But the temptation was too much. Jason snatched up the phone, his fingers jabbing at the screen to find Naomi’s number. A conversation, that’s all he needed. A moment of clarity. A break from his own damn pride. With a heavy sigh, he pressed the call button, the ringtone an alarm bell echoing in his ear.
“What’s wrong?” Naomi’s brisk, sharp tone caught Jason by surprise.
Jason snorted, hoping it sounded casual. “What makes you think something’s wrong? Can’t I just call to check in?”
“Are you kidding?” Naomi’s laughter sliced through his false nonchalance like only she could do. “You’ve been avoiding me like a ghosted hookup for days now. You wouldn’t call unless something was up. Just tell me what it is so I can deal with it and get back to my dinner. ”
“Alright, fine.” Jason raked his fingers through his sweat-dampened hair. “I met Ren last night.”
“Ah.” Naomi’s knowing pause spoke volumes. “Lemme guess. You tore him a new one, and it pissed off Tae Hyun.”
Jason scoffed at how easily she could read him, even over the phone. “What the hell, Naomi?”
“Okay, then tell me I’m wrong.”
Jason groaned, grabbing his sweat towel to mop his brow. “Okay, fine. But it’s more than that. It’s–” He paused, swallowing his words before sharing that Ren had tried to kiss Tae Hyun. That wasn’t his story to tell. “He’s just off.Something about him doesn’t feel right.”
“And this isn’t jealousy talking?” Naomi’s skeptical tone grated.
“Since when have I ever let jealousy get in the way of my relationship with Tae Hyun?” Jason countered, his voice rising. “Besides, I trust Tae Hyun implicitly.”
“That’s a fair point,” Naomi conceded. “Then what is it?”
