Page 87 of Just Friends Forever
“I don’t know what I’d do if we raced into this and then you changed your mind.”
“I don’t think I will, Troy.”
“I know, but …”
He doesn’t have to finish. We both know what he could say: I didn’t think I’d change my mind about Curtis, either. I’ve learned a lot since then, but Troy has every reason to be wary.
“I’d rather give you some time to figure things out,” he says. “There’s a lot on the line here for both of us.”
I nod.
His gaze fixes on mine, and I’m on fire with the way he’s looking at me. “I want to kiss you so badly right now, Stevie. You have no idea.”
My heart flips, and I’m praying hewillbecause I want to kiss him every bit as badly, and I’m afraid I’ll combust if he looks at me like this any longer.
“But I’m in deep, Stevie,” he says, “and if I kiss you again, I won’t be able to stop.”
I can barely breathe. I don’t want him to stop, but I’m trying to hear him—really hear him—above the clammer of my heart and body.
He squeezes my hand. “I think we should make sure this is what you really want. I know there’s no way toknowknow, but… I think it’s better to pump the brakes for a minute now than once we’re headlong into things.”
“Yeah,” I say softly, my heart throbbing. “Of course.” I understand what he’s saying. I really do. He put himself out there, and I rejected him. It makes perfect sense he’d want a little more evidence that he’s not headed down the same path again. And I want to give that to him.
We stand there in silence, holding hands neither of us want to let go of.
He finally releases mine and takes in a deep breath. “Can I walk you home?”
I smile slightly. “I’d like that.”
He leads the way up the stairs and into his apartment. Austin is asleep on the couch with his headphones in.
When we get down to the foyer, we stop in front of my door.
“This is me,” I say.
“I’ve got a showing with Evelyn tomorrow. You’re welcome to come if you want.”
“I’d like that—if it’s okay with you.”
“Of course,” he says. “You’re still my best friend, right?”
“Right.”
It goes quiet, and I almost think he’s going to kiss me again. Instead, he presses his lips to my cheek. It generates as many butterflies as if he’d kissed me on the lips. Almost.
“’Night, Stevie.”
* * *
I rollover and let my eyelids flutter open as the morning sun creeps through the edges of the curtains. I frown, trying to identify the strange sensation I’m feeling inside.
And then it hits me.
It’s hope.
Ever since things started to sour with Curtis, there’s been this weight in my stomach, like I messed things up for real and for good. It’s made it hard to feel positive about the future.
Until now. Because of Troy.
