Page 79 of Tears of the Wolf
Brynn undressed down to her chemise, but the autumn chill had set in, so she pulled on her woolen shawl. Sitting alone on the edge of the bed, Brynn set to combing out her hair. Things had been going well and she thought things were getting sorted out between her and Cenric, but now…
She was still just a silly girl, sure she could make a stranger love her. How could she be this stupid twice?
Brynn redid her braids and tied them off. She might as well climb into the bed. There would be work to do tomorrow. She reached out, sensing the sleeping figures of the household boys and girls nestled into their beds. All was silent. All was peaceful.
She waited, wondering if Cenric might spend the whole night drinking and carousing with his old friends. Still, she waited up for him. She wasn’t sure why.
It was some time before Brynn sensed Cenric coming by hiska.He entered the bedchamber quietly, letting Snapper in first. The dog trotted over to Guin’s basket as Cenric shut the door after him. His face was a mask of shadows by the firelight.
“You were waiting for me?” Cenric sounded surprised.
Brynn pulled her shawl closer around her shoulders, avoiding looking at him. “Your friends are well?”
“They’re fine.” Cenric approached the bed, circling around to her side.
She cleared her throat. “Good.”
Snapper realized Guin was asleep and made a disappointed sound, dropping back on his haunches. He curled beside the basket, settling down for the night.
“I apologized for you.” Cenric sat down beside Brynn, the mattress shifting under his weight. “Hróarr forgave you as soon as he tasted the wine.”
Brynn’s hands clenched into her shawl. So, he agreed she had done something wrong. Brynn had been beating herself up for hours over her outburst, but it still stung Cenric took Hróarr’s side.
“So, what happened?” Cenric fixed her in a steady gaze. He didn’t sound upset, which made it worse.
“I don’t know.” Brynn was so angry, so upset, so frustrated. Her whole life, she had done her duty. She had followed the rulesand done the right thing. Yet she never seemed to get a right result.
She had been the dutiful, sweet, and hardworking wife to Paega, but he had been cold to her to the day she left. Despite that, despite how unpleasant it was for both of them, she’d bedded him so she could conceive a child. When that child had come, something in her life had finally been good. She had done everything she knew to do for that child, but in an instant, he had been murdered. Senselessly. Pointlessly.
Now Brynn did everything she knew to do in her new role as lady of Ombra. She served its people, did her best to please Cenric, and tried to make peace with his neighbors. But it had been nearly a month, and despite his heated kisses among the cairns, he hadn’t bedded her. He had to be unsatisfied with her somehow. That was all she could think of.
She’d told Cenric she was willing. But she had all but begged Paega to pay his marriage debt. She didn’t want to have to plead yet again for a man to swyve her.
She was tired of begging for men’s attention when other women seemed to attract it effortlessly, even when they didn’t want to.
Cenric rested his hands on his knees. “You said you were fine with my Valdari cousin visiting.”
Brynn kept her attention on the fire. “I will do better in the future.” It was a phrase she had uttered a thousand times to Paega—better in the future. Because she had proven herself not good enough. She was never good enough.
Cenric exhaled a long breath. “Hróarr has heard there’s a raiding party headed for Leofton, a village north of here.”
“What?” Brynn’s whole body stiffened.
“It’s more than a day on foot, but it’s in my lands.”
Her heart raced, pounding in her ears. “Hróarr told you this?”
“He’s heard rumors.” Cenric grimaced. “I’m taking a few of my thanes with Hróarr’s crew to see if we can head them off.”
“You’re leaving?” Brynn wasn’t sure why her voice cracked at that. “You’re just going to take your thanes and leave us in the middle of the harvest season?”
“I am leaving most my thanes here.” Cenric spoke slowly the way he might to a small child. “We’ll wait a few days to see if the raiding party shows and if not, we will return.”
Inexplicable fear clawed its way up Brynn’s throat. “We’re set to begin slaughtering animals in mere days. We need you here.”
“As I said, I will be leaving most of my thanes. I’m only taking Anders and Kalen with me. Edric will remain here in charge of defense.”
“You can’t be serious.” Of everything he might have said, Brynn had not predicted this. “You can’t just leave. There’s still so much work to be done before winter. What if the raids come here? What if more of your neighbors come?”
