Page 3 of The Vampire Always Rises
He released the last little shred of hope, and let himself sink down into oblivion.
Chapter One
“Underwear, check. Toothbrush, check. Brand-new cosmetics, check. Gin for Allie, check.”
“Gin for Allie?” Ellis, a friend since we were both shy, geeky kids in grade school, wrinkled his nose in the manner that a former boyfriend had told him was utterly adorable, and gave the bottle I held a scornful look. “Why are you taking gin to the Czech Republic?”
“I’m taking this bottle of expensive and hard-to-find gin because my aunt Roxy’s friend Allegra supposedly likes gin, and it’s my way of thanking her for hooking me up with whatever vampires are in the area.” I rolled a couple of pairs of yoga pants around the bottle, and wedged it in the bottom of the suitcase. “I figured it was the least I could do. OK, that’s it for me. Are you set?”
“Darling, I don’t leave for another week,” Ellis said, giving an airy wave of his hand. He was currently lounging on my recliner, sipping the bottle of wine he’d brought to bid mebon voyage, and offering criticisms of my wardrobe, packing technique, and general outlook on life. “I’m not the sort of person who makes lists like you do. I toss a few well-chosen and exquisitely cut garments in a bag, and then I’m off to face adventure with a style and panache not seen since the days of William Powell and Errol Flynn.”
“That 1930s movie class has really changed you,” I said, chewing my lower lip for a second over the last couple of items laid out on the bed. “Hmm.”
“What are youhmming about?”
“Swimsuit.” I said the word with the distaste it deserved.
“What about it? You know, this rosé is really quite drinkable. I wasn’t sure about it because rosés can be so temperamental, but this is tolerable.”
“The ‘hmm’ was whether or not to pack it. The swimsuit, that is, not the wine you brought.” I held up the swimsuit. “Do you think it’s too ... revealing?”
“I couldn’t possibly comment unless you were wearing it.”
I stared in horror at him. “I’m not going to let you see me in a swimsuit.”
“Why not?”
“Because!” I said, sputtering a little and turning bright pink at the very idea. “Because you’re—”
“Gay?” he asked.
“No! I don’t care about that. But you’re ...”
“A man?”
“Well ... yes, I guess that’s part of it.” I flapped my hands around helplessly, trying to think of how to explain one of the many weird hang-ups I’d had to deal with. “But mostly it’s because you’re my friend. What you think matters, you see, and if you think I look pudgy in my swimsuit, then I’ll be crushed.”
“Pudgy?” He tipped his head and considered me. Instantly, I sucked in my gut. “I wouldn’t say ‘pudgy’ is the word to describe you. ‘Titian,’ now, that’s a good word. You’ve got the red hair and the lush curves to stand up to the most nubile of Titian’s ladies.”
“That’s sweet of you,” I said, relaxing a bit. “I just ... it feels weird to let a man see so much of my body.”
He snorted into the wineglass. “If I managed to keep from succumbing to your many and various charms in the tenth grade when we sat behind the gym and necked, I think you’re safe now.”
“That’s because you don’t like women in a sexual way,” I pointed out, and wadded up the swimsuit and stuffed it into a corner in the case. It was followed almost immediately by the oversized man’s shirt I used as a cover-up. “The necking was just you trying to figure out who you were. Rats.”
“Where?”
I sighed and dug out of my nightstand drawer a battered and somewhat dusty box. “If I’m going to wear the swimsuit, I’m going to have to ... er ... deforest.”
“Deforest?” Ellis did the nose-wrinkling thing again. “DeForest Kelley, fromStar Trek?”
“No, deforest, as in prune the lady garden.”
He stared at me, the glass of wine held motionless at his mouth.
I sighed even louder, and waved the box toward my crotch. “Wax my pubes, you boob.”
Enlightenment dawned at last. “You mean you’re not already spruced up down there?”
