Page 16 of See, Hear, Speak No Evil, Mr. Darcy
“To what purpose? Barring him for honesty seems extreme. I now understand that, in your denying my repeated requests to take us to Town, you showed a greater kindness than you might have done by giving in to my demands. Lizzy’s and Jane’s warning of our being shunned was agreed to in no uncertain terms. So, truly, I thank you, Mr. Bennet,” Mrs. Bennet said through lips pressed thin. “Your friend and his sister are welcome, Lizzy. Your father does not care what goes on in this house so long as his peace is not disturbed. You girls well know it.”
“Tell me now, what did this Mr. Darcy say of your behavior? Whatrightdid he have to say it?”
“You have not cared how I have managed since the day you married me. You were to help me learn the duties of the mistress of this house. You take no interest in me, and now, you take little interest inus. I gave up hope that you might care some time ago. We have gone this long without your guidance. I daresay we can manage well enough without it today.” Mrs. Bennet dismissed her husband with the same nonchalance he had shown her these many years.
“What confuses me is how you push us towards compromising situations when you know it can lead to great unhappiness,” Mary said, the only one looking at her, whilst her sisters looked at their father.
“Are you never wrong, Mary?” Mrs. Bennet sighed.
“It is rare enough that my sisters have stopped questioning me,” Mary said with a diffident shrug of one shoulder, then smiled when the ladies burst out laughing.
“Thank you, Mary,” Mrs. Bennet said, taking care to infuse warmth in words so her middle daughter knew she continued to be pleased with her honesty.
“Mother, I will attend to the letter to Uncle Gardiner. But first, I must send Charlotte the note inviting her to tea. I shall just take my cup of coffee with me.” Elizabeth stood.
“I forbid you to write this letter,” Mr. Bennet declared.
Mrs. Bennet knew some guilt when she and the girls talked on without including Mr. Bennet. She felt relief when she saw his anger subside. In the end, they all understood that their having taken matters in hand suited him, so he would not have to do these things himself.
“It is unfortunate neither of you could look past your misery to help your daughters,” Mary said. Without inflection, there was no accusation, only a statement of fact.
“I agree,” Lydia said. “Mama informed me this morning that some of those I called friends are forbidden to interact with me. Their families find me too flamboyant and indecorous. I hope it is not my friends who shun me of their own accord.”
“Why would you think they might shun you?” asked Mr. Bennet.
When Lydia shook her head, Mrs. Bennet answered for her youngest child.
“Lydia flitted about pressing men to dance with her at the assembly last evening. Begged them to pay her compliments.”
“Then all was as expected, was it not?” Mr. Bennet’s lips twisted into a wry sort of smile.
“Why do you hate us all so much, Father?” Lydia asked tearfully.
Mrs. Bennet understood well why Mr. Bennet had lost the ability to draw a breath. A tear fell to his cheek. She suspected he could not get his bearings, that the room swam in his vision. Guessing this was the first time her husband was forced to see how his actions and inactions were viewed through the eyes of their children, she felt a modicum of sympathy. Her brief talk with Mary had changed many of her certainties into humiliations.
“I do not hate you, child. I do not hate any of my daughters. I have loved you since the day you were born,” Mr. Bennet said, struggling to get the words out.
“If laughing at me and calling me one of the silliest girls in all of England is what you call love, then why do you not do so with Jane as you do with Mary, Kitty, and me? Or make sport of Lizzy? We are all well aware she is the only one you care for,” Lydia accused.
“I—”
Mrs. Bennet saw her husband, a man ever ready with a witty retort, staring at their daughter at a complete loss for words.
“Kitty and I watched Charlotte, Jane, Lizzy, and Mary for the last hour of the assembly. I am angry, but I'm unsure whether Mama is most at fault, you, or if it is mine because I refused to listen to Lizzy and Jane when they said my behavior was improper. The only conclusion is that you hate us just as much as you hate our mother. You hate all of us except Lizzy.” Lydia fled the room in tears.
“I was forced to see us through very different eyes last evening.” Mrs. Bennet touched the handkerchief to the tip ofher nose. “It was an unpleasant experience. I spent the rest of the night writing questions for my daughters to answer. I first attempted to have Jane do so. She refused, so I asked Mary instead, since Lizzy was walking out. Her answers were all I feared and more. You must understand, Mr. Bennet. I needed to know how many ways I was failing in my duties, both as mother and the mistress of this house.”
“You are an excellent hostess, Fanny. None can refute it.”
“But one duty of an estate’s mistress. You failed us all, but mine are the more grievous between us. I failed to give you an heir. I hope one day to gain your forgiveness. Only then might I be able to forgive myself. Last night, I finally recognized that I have been angry with myself for much of these last two decades, and I am exhausted.”
“Fanny, you should not—”
“I am not ashamed of having our daughters. I am proud of them all, and I am disheartened to know you are not.” Mrs. Bennet then escaped her husband’s censure, if with more grace than had Lydia.
Mr. Bennet’s Thoughts Take an Unexpected Turn
When Bennet found his bearings, he had retreated to his bookroom and was again at his desk. He had known the day would come when he would be called to account for his sins. He had, however, always assumed he would be facing his Heavenly Father when it occurred. Bennet wept for the first time in decades.
