Page 39 of The Bride
“There will be plenty of time come May.”
I nodded. May. When this whole thing would be over and we would move on with our lives.
It was good that he was so focused on that. On the future. On his dream.
Really really good.
I had spaghetti and meatballs and he had the chili. When we got back to the house I gave him his birthday present. Fur-lined work gloves for winter. He loved them.
And red velvet cake with cream cheese icing.
It was his favorite.
* * *
Ellie
October
So life was rolling along. School continued to be school, boys continued to ignore me, and I tried to focus on my grades, mostly because Jake insisted, but really what was the point?
I was going to be rancher. Did I really have to know geometry?
It was so crazy to think about the things that used to upset me BDD (Before Dad Dying) and now.
BDD: When was I going to finally lose my virginity?
Now: Did I know enough to handle running a fairly large cattle ranch? Was I making a mistake even trying to do this?
BDD: Were Chrissy and Karen hanging out without me? More importantly, were they talking about me?
Now: I hoped Chrissy and Karen got to hang, because I had no time to see them. I hoped they wouldn’t forget me completely. Maybe talk about me once and a while.
BDD: Was Jake going to marry Janet?
Now: Who was Jake sleeping with?
Yeah, I’m not going to lie. Those thoughts started to creep in. I guess it happened after the trip to Missoula, because I knew why he’d gone. I knew he’d had sex with someone else. Heck, I was the one who encouraged him to do it.
I hadn’t accounted for how it was going to make me feel. I tried not to think about it.
I tried really hard.
Then, what I came to forever refer to as #penisgate, happened.
* * *
“Hey,” I called out when I heard the back door open.
“Damn it Ellie! The shoes.” Shoot, I had made a mental note to get them before Jake got home. Jake always griped when I left my shoes by the door because he inevitably tripped over them and Jake didn’t like tripping.
“Sorry! My mental note got lost.”
“Whatever,” Jake returned.
“How cold is it outside?”
Weather was a new thing in my life.
