Page 56 of The Lover
It was horrible. I would glance behind me, but when I did I would see the blood and I could not handle the sight of Ellie bleeding. I wasn’t so stupid that I didn’t know what it meant, but I couldn’t think about that right now. My focus had to be on Ellie.
Ellie was in pain. Ellie was bleeding.
I needed to make those things stop.
It felt like forever, but in reality it was the shortest drive into town ever. I pulled up in front of the clinic and jumped out. It wasn’t easy because she was having another cramp, but I managed to pull Ellie out of the back seat so that she was in my arms.
“Breathe through it, Ellie,” I told her. “Short pants, then deep breaths.”
I was a rancher. I had watched any number of things give birth. Breathing was the only thing you could do to not tighten up against the pain.
“Dr. Jenkins!” I shouted as soon as I got through the door.
Mary bounced up and took one look at me and seemed to know immediately what was happening.
Right. Ellie had said something about the clinic. She must have been here earlier today, maybe worried about the bleeding. I had been pushing her these last two weeks that she needed to make an official appointment.
“Follow me,” Mary said and led me to the examination room straight ahead. She opened the door and I put Ellie on the table.
“The doctor is in with someone, but I’ll get him now.”
Ellie rolled to her side with a groan. She was sobbing now, but I didn’t know if it was from the pain or…
I couldn’t think about that now.
Dr. Jenkins came in and then immediately turned to me. “I need you step out.”
“I’m not leaving her.”
“Jake, I’m telling you now. Step out of the room.”
“Go, Jake,” Ellie cried from the table even as her hands were pressed against her belly. “Please go. I don’t want you to see.”
I had never felt more useless in my life. I walked out of the room and the door closed behind me and it was like nothing I had ever felt before. I walked down the short hallway and sat in one of chairs in the waiting area, my head in my hands as I thought about what just happened.
I had been so freaking happy today. Had been every day since she’d been home. As happy as I had been, was as sad as I was now.
Why couldn’t Ellie and I ever get a break? One fucking time, a break. From pain and loss and sadness.
A half hour later I looked up and Dr. Jenkins was standing in front of me.
“It’s done, Jake. As far as I can tell, she was about ten weeks along.”
I knew exactly how far along she was. It happened on her birthday. I closed my eyes against the pain.
“I’m going to send her in the ambulance to Jefferson.”
“Why?” I asked with a new sense of fear. “Is something else wrong? Is there some kind of complication?”
He shook his head and put his hand on my shoulder, I suppose to calm me. “No. But given how far along she was, there is a procedure to make sure everything has been expelled from the uterus. I don’t have the facility for it here. She’ll go to Jefferson, they’ll probably do it first thing tomorrow morning, and then you can take her home after that. You know where you’re going?”
I nodded. “Jefferson Hospital.” It wasn’t like there was more than one hospital.
“You okay to drive?”
I looked up at him. “Yeah. Can I see her?”
He had that sad somber look I assumed all doctors must practice when they had to deliver bad news. “She’s a little upset right now, Jake. I would give her some time. You’ll see her once they put her in a room at the hospital.”
