Page 31 of Caleb's Salvation
And there it was. Right out in the open, no getting around it. I thought about it. Maybe I could try to see if a kiss might change my feelings. But then I remembered why I’d accepted this date. All those ulterior motives were sitting between us, and I knew kissing Ty, giving him any sense that we might become something, was wrong.
“I’m sorry, Ty. I just…I guess I’m not ready…”
“No, you don’t have to explain,” he said. “I kind of felt like it wasn’t going to happen. I just thought I’d ask. You’re too fucking pretty not to at least ask.”
“I’m sorry,” I repeated. “We’re still friends, though, right?”
“Oh, I’m not going anywhere. Cal made you part of my job, and that’s not changing.”
Because Caleb couldn’t handle being around me. Was it even possible that could change? Sometimes I didn’t see how. I sighed. “Thanks, Ty. You really are a great guy.”
He smiled. “Thanks for going out with me. Even if it was just this one time, all the guys back at camp think I’m a total badass for asking you.”
I laughed. “Good night.”
I got out and headed for the cabin. I gave him a wave before his truck took off. It wasn’t late, but I knew Sammy would be asleep by now. I opened the door and found Shelby reading her Kindle with a heavy blanket over her lap.
“Hey,” I said.
“How did it go?” she asked, quickly getting up.
I shrugged. “The date went about as expected. Ty is super nice, but I just don’t have those feelings for him. He asked if he could kiss me…and I said no. Was that mean? Should I have at least tried to find out if there was any chemistry?”
“Honey, did you want to kiss him?”
I shook my head.
“Please, if my momma had lived long enough, I’m sure she would have told me the very good advice that you shouldn’t go around kissing boys you don’t want to kiss. But you know I’m more interested in Cal’s reaction.”
“Not a clue. He came over to the table, glared at me. And then left the bar without even looking at me.”
Shelby clapped her hands quietly. “I think that’s a good sign.”
I was skeptical. Because the more I thought about it, the more I didn’t know if it was fair to Caleb. To push him into something he wasn’t ready for. To make him notice me when I wasn’t someone hewantedto notice. The whole thing confused me to the point I had to push it all aside. Worries for a different day.
I’d told Ty the truth and I felt good with that decision. The easing of my guilt made me feel lighter.
“How did Sammy do?” I asked as I wandered over to his crib to see him sleeping peacefully. On his belly, thumb close, but not quite touching his lips, as if it just fell out of his mouth as soon as he fell asleep. I leaned down to adjust the blanket so it was tucked over his shoulder.
“He was a champ. Took his bottle then I read him a bedtime story, and he was out like a light. You all good or do you need some girl chat?”
I shook my head. “No, I’m good.” Any thinking about men I’d do tonight was between me and me, I’d decided.
I gave Shelby a hug. “Thank you. For everything. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
She hugged me back. “You’d figure something else out is what you’d do. Because you’re a fighter. Remember that, Vivienne. Because that’s exactly what Cal needs.”
She left and I plunked myself down in my chair thinking about tonight. Trying not to wonder what it meant that he’d left so early. Although I knew I wasn’t going to have to wonder about it for long. Two beers. My first two beers ever and I was definitely buzzed. No problem falling asleep tonight, I thought.
The knock on the door startled me. Shelby wouldn’t have knocked if she’d forgotten something. Which meant it could be Ty. Maybe he thought to come back and change my mind?
I walked to the door. “Ty? Is that you?”
“No, it’s not fucking Ty.”
Nearly jumping back at his tone, I opened the door to find an evidently still ornery Caleb.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, even though my heart was racing.
