Page 7 of Caleb's Salvation
“What the fuck?” It looked like she’d barely touched any of it.
Her eyebrow rose. “I would ask that you not use that language in front of my son.”
“Then you shouldn’t have brought your son to an oil drilling town in Alaska,” I growled.
She shrugged. “Fair enough.”
I looked at the crate of food. “You’ve barely eaten any of what I brought.”
“That’s not quite true. I ate what I needed to not be hungry and make sure I could still provide milk for Sam. Now I have a few weeks of stores to tide me over. I’ve already met Jenny. And she said she’d bring me some elk from her next hunt. Also, Eli and Shelby promised me some fish from their next trip out. I’ve got options so I’m covered for now and you are off the hook.”
I couldn’t wrap my head around it. She’d been stockpiling food. Planning for the day when I would stop providing it.
“You ate enough not to be hungry. Were you ever full?”
She looked at me and I could almost see through her fine, freckle-covered skin to the bones of her cheek. Sharper than they should be. Homeless and hungry.
“I’m fine. But I’m not going back, and you can’t make me. You’re stuck with me, Caleb.”
“People around here call me Cal,” I snapped. Even Sarah had called me Cal.
“Sorry, you were Caleb on your profile so that’s how I think of you. I’ll try to remember.”
“You can’t stay…this isn’t the place for you. It’s too…hard.”
She laughed in that way she did where there was no humor. It was gut wrenching.
“Hard? I’ve knownhardmy whole life. This, living here, making friends with the community here. Being free. This isn’t hard.”
“What happens if you can’t find a way to make money?” I pressed. “Honest money. What then?”
She wrapped her arms around her body in a protective gesture, and I felt like an ass for raising the threat of what if. There was a camp of men not an hour away who hadn’t had a woman in an awfully long time. Based on what she’d said before, she had to know there would always be a way for a young, attractive woman to make money in Hope’s Point.
“I’ve had to face down difficult choices before. I always came out okay. I’m betting I’ll come out okay again. For Sam’s sake, if not for mine.”
“What if I told you I don’t want you here?”
Because I didn’t. I didn’t want to look at her or the baby. They touched me, which meant they hurt me. I came to this place to get away from the things that hurt me.
“I would feel bad about that. Seeing as how I’m hoping most folks, once they get to know me, will like me. But I’m an American and last time I checked this was still America. You can’t make me leave.”
“You’ll change your mind,” I said. “Winter hits in a few weeks and it starts getting dark, you’ll know this isn’t the place for you and a baby.”
She shrugged. “Well, we’ll just have to see about that. Also, so you know, technically we never had our date. I want you to know that if you ever want to take me out to Bud’s one night, I would still be open to that idea.”
“Have you been listening to anything I’ve said?” I asked, incredulously.
“I’ve been hearing you, sure. But I also know how you’ve been these past two weeks. It’s the way you look at me sometimes. Like you’re almost desperate to take care of me. I’m not going to lie, I would love to have someone to lean on for a time.”
I laughed harshly. “I can promise you, I have no desire to take care of anybody. Ever again. And what the hell makes you think I’d be attracted to some kid with freckles all over her face. You said you’re twenty-six, you look like you’re sixteen. Not even a woman.”
“That was mean, Caleb. But I’ve heard way worse. So you’re going to have to get a lot meaner if you think to scare me off. Now, if you don’t mind, it’s time to feed Sam. As unattractive as I am, I’m sure you don’t want to watch.”
I scowled at her, but she didn’t flinch. I looked at her chest and it was obvious to see the part about her not being a woman was a lie. Her breasts were high and round and full of milk. Her nipples would be engorged.
I’d never seen anything more erotic than my wife’s breasts when she’d been nursing Emily.
The pain of that memory helped to focus me. Without another word, I turned my back on her and left.
