Page 108 of Enemies to Prom Dates
“Chas is in love with me. Totally, fully, one hundred percent in love. We’re talking about going to the same college. I’m not saying we’re getting married tomorrow, but it’s not like it’s totally unheard of for high-school couples in this town to get married. Look at Kris and Benny, or Amy and Carl. All of them got together and stayed together.”
“Okay,” I said. “Well, then you might want to ask your future husband a few questions about what really happened to his car.”
“I don’t care,” Star said as stubborn as I’ve ever seen her. “If it’s important, he’ll tell me. Otherwise, I don’t need to know.”
“Oh, I see. Your plan is to bury your head in the sand so you don’t know what your partner is up to. Yes, I get it. Because that worked out so well for Mom!”
“What worked out for me?”
Our mother was coming through the front door followed by Lyd, Kit and Mary. All of them had shopping bags in their hands from various different clothing stores in town and, suddenly, I wanted to scream.
We didn’t have the money to go shopping. We were using what I made at The Club to buy food. We’d all been lying to ourselves for months, thinking somehow we were going to escape the inevitable, and now, I learned Star actually believed it, too.
“How much did all of that cost?” I screeched.
Immediately, my mother’s back got straighter. “We only bought what was on sale! But you can’t expect the girls not to have the proper clothes for school.”
Mary raised the bags in her hands. “These aren’t mine. They just made me carry their stuff.”
Of course they would make Mary do that. It only made me angrier.
“Yes, yes. I can expect that!” I shouted. “We don’t have any money! You need to be hiring a lawyer, who can track down Dad and divorce him! Then we need to sell this house and buy something we can afford until you can get a job and support yourself. Star and I need to be thinking about scholarships and charitable funds we can apply to so we can go to college. And Mary, Kit and Lyd should be thinking about ways to wear the clothes and shoes they currently have for as long as they possibly can!
“I am so tired of the delusion that’s been happening in this family. And you, too, Star. I thought at least you understood. You honestly think Chas is the answer? I can tell you, he’s not. He’s got his own serious trouble that he has to work through before he could ever be some kind of hero to you. This charade ends now. Everyone has to find ways to contribute to this household besides me or I swear I’ll stop sharing the money I earn. Dad is not coming back. Accept it!”
I heard one of the girls, probably Kitty, because she was the most emotional of us, start sniffling and I bolted upstairs for my room. I slammed the door behind me and locked it. Then fell on the bed.
In a fit, I slammed both my fists and my toes into the bed and screamed again into my pillow.
We’d been living a lie for months and finally, finally I was done with it.
My father was gone. He’d left us, and he wasn’t coming back. And the way he’d left meant he never really cared at all. Grief poured over me and I realized that’s what needed to happen as well.
We need to cry together. We needed to allow ourselves to be sad he was gone. Sad or angry or both. Fitz was right. There was no way we were still fooling everyone into thinking this was some sort of temporary separation.
We weren’t kidding anyone, and I was tired of trying. I was especially tired of doing that within my own family.
Rolling over, I looked up at the ceiling of my bedroom. The space I’d called mine for years. It was big and comfortable and there were shelves of books. Probably every book anyone had ever bought me. My big fancy desk. My Macbook Air on top of it. A closet full of clothes and shoes and dresses I never really wore.
How much more did I need?
We would be fine without Dad. I knew it. I just needed all of them to see it, too.
I felt my phone vibrate in my back pocket and took it out desperately hoping it was Fitz. Even though I’d just spent the day with him, I needed to feel like someone was on my side.
Only it wasn’t Fitz. I frowned at the message not certain what to do. The one thing I did know, I couldn’t ignore it.
23
Fitz
Iwalked inside my house feeling like crap. Given the tension between all of us, we’d opted to skip dinner. After we’d dropped the girls off, Chas hadn’t said a word. He had every right to be angry with me, but I felt like I had every right to be angry with him as well. He’d gotten himself into trouble and he hadn’t once thought to come to me for help. Or even tell me about his problem in the first place.
I thought we were closer than that, but I was coming to find out maybe my world was more insular than it appeared to be.
“Fitz! Is that you?”
My mom was probably happy to have me home where I could be arrested in the comfort of my own property.
