Page 155 of The Lyon Whisperer
“What do you mean?” Amelia asked on a whisper.
“I didn’t realize until the morning she was gone. By the time I went searching for her, it was too late.”
Her father’s chin trembled, and Amelia felt the backs of her own eyes burning.
“She’d taken one of her midnight rides. I found her in St. James Park, her beloved mare not far off. It had been a moonless night. The mare must have stumbled over the uneven ground. She threw Letty, who landed hard and sustained severe injuries.”
“A riding accident? But you said she died of a fever,” Amelia said.
“So she did. She was alive when I found her, and half crazed with hypothermia and pain. She had my pistol. She pressed it into my hand, talking gibberish.”
Tears welled in Amelia’s eyes, blurring her vision. “What did she say?”
Sadness radiated from him in waves. “She bade me watch over you and begged my forgiveness. She said it was all her fault. If she hadn’t toyed with Selbie, he would never have threatened you, our daughter.
“But she was wrong, Amelia. It was all my fault. If I had only reined her in to begin with, forbidden her those midnight rides and reckless ways, she would never have been on a horse in the middle of the night to begin with.”
Amelia could not speak over the hard lump in her throat. Tears flowed down her cheeks unchecked.
“I promised her I would keep you safe, and swore I’d deal with Selbie. By the time I got her home, she lapsed into unconsciousness. The doctor did what he could, but in the end, the fever took her.”
Amelia scrubbed the tears from her eyes and stiffened her spine. She had to hear the end of the tale. “What of Lord Selbie?”
Her father’s gaze turned resolute. “I knew I could not risk a duel. If something happened to me, if I died, I would leave you orphaned, and for what? To satisfy my pride? Instead, I let him know I had the letter he sent Leticia in a safe place and would broadcast his pernicious attempt at blackmail to the polite world, thereby destroying him socially should I hear one whisper hinting at impropriety concerning your birth. Afterward, I would kill him.”
A profound silence greeted his summation. Amelia had no doubt but that her father had meant every word. Clearly Lord Selbie had been convinced of the same.
Finally, Amelia spoke. “Why did you decide to tell me this after all this time?”
Her father slanted a speaking glance at Chase. “Because of your husband.”
“My…” She glanced between her husband and her father.
Chase’s inscrutable expression told her nothing.
“What has Chase to do with this?”
Her father scrubbed a hand over his face. “All these years I’ve done my best to keep you from making the mistakes your mother made. I tamped down the part of you that sprang from her, telling myself I was keeping you safe, when in fact I had it all wrong, again.
“You are like your mother—the best parts. You are beautiful and brave and unafraid to use your mind to question the status quo. Youdotake risks. However, not as an adventure seeker, but in your quest to aid others, including your beloved animals.
“I confused your unwillingness to fit into a mold with recklessness because I feared losing you the way I lost your mother. I was so afraid of making the same mistakes, of history repeating itself.
“Instead, I made other mistakes. Chase pointed out my constant criticisms and disapproval only caused you pain, as if I did not see what a precious gift I have in you. And for that, I am truly sorry.”
Amelia nodded, her throat once again tight.
“I love you, Amelia, more than anyone or anything in the world. I promise to do better about making sure you know.”
Warmth filled her to overflowing. “I love you, too, Papa,” she choked out.
He cleared his throat, and his expression sobered. “Lastly, let us deal with the wager. Where did you hear of it?”
She darted a glance toward Chase. “Lady Tully informed me.”
Chase cursed under his breath. “By God that woman is a menace. When?”
“Last night at the ball.”
