Page 64 of Souls of Steel
His reaction took me aback so much that for a few seconds, I didn’t know what to say. Then, his words processed and anger surged through me. I tried to come up with anything that could possibly justify the horrible treatment women received here, but I found it impossible. “With respect, Sir, that sounds like an excuse for not doing something to fix an unbearable situation. Maybe I’m not in a position to make a change. Maybe I won’t be, ever. But that doesn’t mean I’m not going to try.”
General Rhodes let out a deep sigh. “Fair enough. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
People had been warning me off ever since I’d come to the academy. This wasn’t anything new. Maybe he did mean well or maybe he didn’t, but at this point, I couldn’t be bothered to care.
When he dismissed me, I made my way back to the hangars. As expected, I found my lovers waiting for me there.
August had recovered from his injury, but he was still processing. He’d been shocked to learn that, for some reason, he’d witnessed the exchange between me and the apsid—from the apsid’s perspective. He was trying to figure out what had happened by getting some lessons on mental abilities from Sphinx.
Meanwhile, Cerberus and Brendan were feeding the remaining chimeras. We’d recently received a supply of fuels from Terra, and my lovers had started distributing it this morning, before I’d left for my meeting.
Pollux had been assigned Charybdis-duty. He was cleaning her parts, making sure she stayed in good condition for whenever her soul could return. Technically speaking, this was something the engineers could do as well. But we took pride in our connection with our chimeras and we wanted to handle every issue ourselves, if it was possible.
“Hey there, beautiful,” Knox greeted me. “How did it go with General Rhodes?”
“Okay, I guess. I’ve been promoted to Acting Pilot, but I still get the feeling they don’t want me here.”
“That’s not going to change overnight, Selene,” Pollux said. “But we have faith in you. You’ll prove to everyone that you’re more than worthy of being a tamer.”
The vote of confidence was nice, but I had to wonder if he really meant his words. Because of everything that had happened to August, we hadn’t gotten the chance to clear the air between us, to talk about their plans and true feelings for me.
My doubts and fears must’ve become obvious because Brendan passed the canister of feed to Knox and fully turned toward me. “Selene? Is something wrong?”
“Is that supposed to be a trick question? You know very few things have been going right lately.”
I didn’t mean to sound bitchy, but my answer still came out snappish and irritated. Brendan didn’t seem shocked. Then again, he very rarely was. “Yes, but I get the feeling something in particular is on your mind.”
“We all know what’s on her mind, Brendan,” August said, emerging from the cockpit of the Sphinx. “We can’t dance around the chimera in the room forever.”
An inappropriate chuckle escaped my lips at his phrasing. I knew what he meant, but it was still funny. “Oh, I don’t know. We have plenty of chimeras we can dance around.”
“If that’s what you’re into as foreplay, I’m all for it,” Brendan answered, just as straight-faced as before. My amusement died a quick death and I took a step back without even knowing why.
“F-Foreplay?” I stammered. “Is that the direction we’re headed in?”
“That’s your decision,” Knox answered. “But if it helps, Selene, I’m tired of being afraid. Being judged, forcing myself into a particular role just because everyone else things I belong there… It’s all bullshit. I want to protect you, but if there’s anything this tournament has taught me, it’s that you’re far stronger than we ever realized. Besides, if I want to keep you safe from other possible dangers, the best way to do it is to stay together.”
“But you already knew that, sweetheart,” Pollux said, his voice a little softer. “I thought you said you weren’t angry with us. Have you changed your mind?”
“No, of course not,” I answered with a sigh. “I guess maybe… It’s me I’m angry with.”
“Oh, Selene.” Knox let out a slow breath. “Is this about what happened on Mercury, with that asshole? It wasn’t your fault. You realize that, right? He forced that kiss on you.”
Yes, he had, but I’d enjoyed it. Or had I? I distinctly remembered clinging to him. Had he been manipulating me the whole time or had I wanted to kiss him?
Dazed and confused, I sat down on the paw of my chimera. “I don’t know what to do.”
August jumped down from on top of the Sphinx and knelt next to me. “Do you want us to back off and never mention anything sexual again?” he asked. “We can do that too, if you’d rather.”
“No!” I cried, with more vehemence than I intended. “I… I just want us to get back to normal.”
Except we didn’t have a normal relationship, did we? We never had. We’d always lied to one another and had other priorities. If there were feelings between us, it wasn’t something I could properly identify. Or could I?
A small, serpentine body emerged from behind the Sphinx and curled around me. “Oh, for Tartarus’s sake,” Tiny Typhon said. “Stop being so hesitant. You’re broodmates. Accept it and move on.”
I’d completely forgotten Brendan had assigned him to watch over me. It had slipped my mind once we’d come back to the academy. Maybe it had slipped Brendan’s mind too. “Typhon, this isn’t necessary,” he said. “We can handle our own love lives. You don’t have to intervene.”
“I very much doubt that, hatchling,” the large version of Typhon replied as his smaller equivalent tightened his hold on me. “I’ve stayed out of it long enough. Now, will you claim your broodmate, or will I be forced to take more drastic steps? Don’t make me fuck her in your stead. I can do that too.”
