Page 65 of Tears of Tungsten
She didn’t let that distract her. Instead, she walked right past me and Jared, bowing in front of her leader. “Great Mother, I apologize for the interruption,” she said, “but we’ve received word of the arrival of an external Terran force.”
“Yes, I know,” the Great Mother replied. “I admit the members of the Grand Chimera Unit were far more resourceful than I expected. But then again, they had a lot of incentive.”
Her words snapped me out of my shock. A surge of enthusiasm and fear swept over me. “The others… They came for me?”
“Of course they came,” Stella snapped. “You somehow convinced them that you’re a good match for them, when it was obviously a lie. And now, they’re all going to die, because of you.”
It looked like I’d been right to be afraid. Expeditions in apsid territory were notoriously dangerous and I doubted the others would’ve managed to get a lot of reinforcements. If they’d come here by themselves, they might as well have signed their own death warrants.
“Why didn’t you stay on Terra and disappear in the shadows?” Stella continued to vent. “Why did you have to join the Grand Chimera Unit? No one wants you there, not really.”
Jared grabbed her elbow and squeezed it tightly. “Teela, don’t do this. Now’s not the time to argue.”
“On the contrary, now is the perfect time. You’re perfectly happy to accept this state of affairs because you have what you wanted. But the rest of us aren’t so lucky, and my brother’s soul is at stake here. August and Pollux might be obliterated altogether. But you don’t care, and neither does she. Now that she’s here, she doesn’t need them anymore.”
“That’s not true,” I replied. “Don’t talk about things you don’t understand. I’m not the one who chose to lie and betray them. And it’s a little too late to worry about their souls, when you allowed August and Pollux to believe you were dead all this time.”
Pollux had been grieving her for years, but all along, she’d been here, with the Heliads. “How dare you claim you have any say in their lives, when you just abandoned them, when you didn’t even try to comfort them? Don’t tell me the Great Mother couldn’t have helped you reach Pollux, because I know that’s a lie.”
Stella glared at me, but didn’t try to argue against that point. “I had my reasons for acting the way I did.”
“I’m sure that’s true, but I don’t really care. Because you know what? Those reasons mean you’re not in any position to judge me.”
“No one can ever judge another person and be completely fair,” the Great Mother intervened. She got up from her throne and made her way toward us. “Even the gods have forsaken this right, granting us the ability to make up our own minds and choose our paths. But in any case, Selene, today isn’t about Teela. It’s about you and your lovers. They came here after you and I assume they won’t leave without you. Why don’t we see if their hearts are as strong as yours?”
I didn’t like the sound of that at all and my fears only intensified when the Great Mother added, “Jar’yd, Teela, go greet our guests. Bring them here.”
“Wait!” I blurted out. “Please don’t hurt them. They don’t mean any harm. If I could just talk to them, they’ll surely leave.”
The Great Mother arched a dark brow at me, not seeming offended by my interruption. “That’s not true, but it doesn’t matter. They’ll be cooperative once they realize they don’t have any other option. Rest at ease. We don’t want to hurt them, not yet. I think you understand what I mean, don’t you?”
The latter question was addressed to Jared and Stella, and the duo didn’t delay in responding. “Yes, Great Mother,” Jared replied, stealing a look at me through the corner of his eye. “We understand and will obey.”
“Thank you, Great Mother,” Stella offered. “We will not fail you.”
“You never do, my children. Now go. We wouldn’t want our young changeling to collapse the quasar in his anger, would we?”
She sounded amused, so I assumed there was no real danger of that happening. Even so, Stella and Jared took the warning seriously. After saluting the Great Mother, they excused themselves and left the Helix.
Once the gates had closed behind them, the Great Mother wrapped an arm around my shoulder. Considering what I’d seen earlier, I’d expected her touch to bother me. It didn’t. It felt normal, like making contact with another human being.
“Now that it’s just the two of us, I want to talk to you, woman to woman,” she said. “Tell me something, Selene Renard. Do you really think you can carry the weight of Brendan Chimera’s destiny, as well as your own? Are you prepared to save them from themselves? Do you understand what sacrifices you’ll have to make, if you choose to go back?”
The questions sounded matter-of-fact, but I still felt each individual sentence like a physical blow, no, like tachyon blasts threatening to tear me apart from the inside. “I’m not sure,” I admitted, “but I want to. Please… Help me.”
I didn’t know what determined me to make that request, but it must have been the right thing to say. The Great Mother smiled, and this time, it held the same gentleness she’d displayed when she’d first appeared in front of me. “I will do what I can, young Selene. But know this. In the end, you’ll still have to help yourself.”
“I’m prepared for that.”
After all, I’d gone to Chimera Academy fully aware that I wouldn’t have any allies there. I’d made a decision to fight my whole society, as long as it meant proving to them that women weren’t inferior. This fight would be different, far more personal, but that didn’t mean I could back out.
“So be it,” the Great Mother said. “Helios will accept your pledge and so will I.”
Our eyes met once again and in her endless gaze, I saw death. But I also saw hope, and for the first time in what seemed like ages, I felt like maybe, I could still find a future for me and my family. For all of us.
* * *
Pollux
