Page 56 of Reverse Pass
I sigh, because this is Cameron. He only thinks about himself, and the fact that he has a full-time job and income. Never mind that I’m still on a grad school budget just trying to get by. The diner near campus is usually the biggest treat I allow myself on any given week, if Joss and I don’t spring for something from the bakery.
And the bakery reminds me of Ben, and I bite the inside of my cheek wondering what he’s doing right now. I haven’t heard from him all day and given that he had a guest last night I could guess where he would be spending another evening. Which makes my chest ache with jealousy and remorse. I should have told Cameron to fuck off the second he walked in the door yesterday, but instead I’d tried to keep things civil, whatever that meant. And now, I am going to pay for it.
“Can we put the knives away for tonight though? I’ve missed you a lot, and I just want to spend an evening like old times.”
“I can try, but it really can’t be like old times Cameron. Too much has changed.”
I see his jaw click, annoyed that I’m not complying with his desire to just slide back into old bad habits. Admittedly they die hard. I don’t want to cause a scene or argue with him in public. I want things to stay calm and him to leave tomorrow without another incident. But I also don’t want to pretend anymore.
The waiter walks up before he can say anything and asks for our orders, and despite my protests he gets an expensive bottle of wine and appetizers before we’re alone again. I set my menu aside, deciding on the salad after all.
“You already know what you want?”
“Yes, I’m just going to get the chicken caesar.”
“You don’t want to do the tasting menu?”
“I’m still on a grad school budget, Cam.”
“I’m obviously paying tonight. I asked you out.”
“I’d rather pay for myself but thank you for offering.” I stare at the candle burning at the table, hoping this dinner goes faster than I imagine it will.
“Is this because of him?” He sets his menu down abruptly.
“Who? The waiter?” I play stupid.
“Ben.”
“That I’m ordering a chicken caesar? No.”
“That you’re being so cold to me.”
“I’m not being cold Cameron. I’m having dinner with my ex-fiancé at what appears to be a very romantic restaurant. It’s not exactly a warm and friendly event, more awkward and uncomfortable. But I’m here because you asked me to be, so we could discuss things and hopefully move on from it.”
“Is that what you want now? To move on?”
“We kind of already have moved on, haven’t we? I mean you quite literally moved to a different continent.”
“I told him this was what this was about.” Cameron gives a sly little grin.
“What? Told who?”
“Ben. We had a little chat before I came here tonight.”
“Why? You need to leave him alone, Cam.”
“Leave him alone? He’s the one sliding into my bed. Fucking my fiancée.”
“I’m not your fiancée anymore. I haven’t been for months. And you’ve been fucking other people, so I don’t understand why you care who I’m fucking or why you’d be harassing them.”
“I wasn’t harassing him. I was just explaining the situation to him. He’s young, and he doesn’t understand, Vi.”
“I doubt that, but please enlighten me. What doesn’t he understand?”
“That he’s a revenge fuck for you. And kudos. Getting an athlete and a younger guy. Making me jealous. Mission accomplished, Violet. You have my attention now, so stop playing with the kid and let’s work things out. I fucked up. I know that. I want to make amends. I want to fix us.”
I laugh, and then I laugh some more. It continues to just bubble up until I’m catching the attention of tables around us, and I have to do my best to stifle it while he glares at me, jaw clenched tight from across the table.
