“That was Tobias’s sister. She’s in town for the game this week. Even if I wasn’t with you, I don’t have a death wish. Tobias might spare me on the basis of friendship after I let him get a few free shots to the face, but Easton and her father would gut me alive for thinking it.”
“Well, she seemed to like you.”
“I’ve known her a long time. She’s like her brothers—friendly.”
“You’re not helping her by comparing her to Tobias given what I know of him so far.”
“Not like that. I mean she’s a sweet girl. But I think of her as a sister.”
“Right. Well, I think I’m going to head home after I finish this drink. So I should say goodbye to Mackenzie and Violet. It’s getting late.”
“I can take you home.”
“Nah. I’m gonna get a car. You stay.” I say bitterly. It’s stupid of me. He’s not mine. We’ve just been blurring lines in a way that makes him feel that way and given everything I just went through with Drew I’m letting feelings get involved where they shouldn’t.
“Saint… What’s wrong?”
“Nothing I just… he was nice. It was nice. Someone just casually flirting with me for once. It made me feel wanted, I guess.”
“I don’t make you feel wanted?” There’s a hint of irritation, and I feel like we’re about to have our first fake couple fight.
“No, not really.”
“Did I hallucinate the last couple of times we’ve been together? You on my counter? You on that couch?” His voice is low so only I can hear.
I will myself not to blush at the thought of those moments and then try to give a casual shrug.
“You’re bored. Forced celibacy isn’t your thing. You’re stuck with me. It’s compulsory flirting and we both know we’re faking it. What I meant is it was nice to have someone just organically flirt with me, okay? It’s fine. I know it can’t go anywhere while we do this.”
“It can’t go anywhere,ever.” His eyes darken, and I don’t like his tone.
I stand straighter because I might do what he wants right now but if he thinks he has any say when this is over, no fucking way.
“Why because your ego couldn’t handle the fact that a woman might move on from you instead of the other way around?”
I can practically hear his jaw click and his teeth grind at that. I see him gearing up to say something that we will both probably regret if his temper gets the better of him and he actually says it out loud.
“I’m sorry,” I say before he can speak. “That was out of line. We shouldn’t do this. Out in public like this. I’m cranky. It’s been a long day. A long week really at work, and I’m up way past my bedtime. I’m gonna get a car and go home. You stay and have fun with your friends. I’ll see you for the game this weekend, okay?”
Several emotions flicker over his face but his eyes soften just a tad, and his brow unwrinkles enough that I’m not as worried he’s about to lecture me.
“Saint—“
“Let’s just talk tomorrow when we’ve both had some sleep, okay?”
“Fine.” He relents.
I pull out my phone, calling a car and then say goodnight to my friends before I head home for the evening. I’m glad to put some space between the two of us because I probably need to have more perspective when it comes to him than I’ve had lately. I keep getting too caught up in the fantasy when I need to stay grounded in reality if we’re going to make this work—and avoid us arguing in public.
THIRTY
Alex
I should be going home.I need sleep. I have practice in the morning. She told me to stay away and talk to her about it later. But I fucking can’t. I’m driving toward her house with the radio turned up because I don’t even fucking understand how we got to where we are tonight. Not after the last few times we’ve been together. I’d felt like I was finally getting to see parts of her she’d kept hidden, finally making progress in getting her to see that I’m not who she thinks I am. Ishouldgo home, but there’s no way I sleep until we clear the air on this.
When I get to her house, I see that a few of the lights are still on. Before I knock unannounced, I decide to do what she’s asked for in the past and text her.
Can we talk?