Page 66 of Lords of Misrule
I frown a little. “I know it won’t be returned, but that’s okay. You love him and somehow you know he loves you too, right?”
“Yeah, but I’m like a brother to him. You’re… way more complicated than that. I don’t know that he knows what to do with you.”
“He is who he is, but it’s enough for me. At least as long as he’s like this, where we’re honest with each other about where we stand and how we treat each other. It’s probably the most I can expect from him.”
“As long as you know what you’re doing.” His fingers tighten around mine, giving me half a smile.
“Never mind about him though. Are you—I mean, you don’t have to say anything back—but are you okay with me feeling that way? Am I fucking it up by telling you?”
“Fuck, no.” He shakes his head. “I’ve been dying to hear you say it. Wanting to tell you myself but not wanting to pressure you with everything that’s been happening. I’ve liked you from afar for years. Wanted you like fucking crazy since that night. Now… I just love you, Charlotte. Unequivocally.”
His finger swipes at the tear that’s starting to fall down my cheek.
“Don’t cry about it though. You’ll give me a complex.”
“I’m sorry… I just. Hearing you say it. I’m just so happy. And I’ve spent so long waiting for the next thing to go wrong, and you make me feel so safe.”
He leans over the edge of the tub and kisses me.
“Of course. I have you. Always.”
We sit like that for a while longer, until the water gets cold, and I need to hurry up and finish getting clean. I jump in the shower for a quick final rinse and to wash my hair. He lets me finish alone, leaving me with a towel and a kiss.
When I make my way out to the closet, Rowan’s there on the bed. The black sheets are unmade, and his eyes track me as I cross the room and go to the door. I slip into PJ shorts and a tank before I come out again. He mutes the TV and nods to the spot next to him.
“What are you watching?” I look at the TV but it’s on a commercial.
“Nothing really. Just waiting for you.” He reaches back to his nightstand, grabs a water and a bowl, and hands them to me. “You should eat and drink. I can get you something else if you want.”
I look down at the bowl, and it’s full of blackberries and raspberries mixed together. My heart skips in my chest at the gesture. If it were anyone else, I’d shrug it off. I would think that maybe it was the last thing we had in the fridge or maybe he got it for himself and didn’t want it. But with Rowan, it’s more.
“Thank you. I love it,” I say softly, keeping my eyes glued to the fruit.
“I’ll eat the blackberries if you don’t want them.”
“I want them.”
“I thought you preferred raspberries.”
“Turns out I like them both. Love them both really.” I risk a glance to look at him.
He shifts against the pillows before he speaks.
“Good. I love them both too.”
I hold up a blackberry for him, and he takes it, grabbing the controller again to flip through the channels on the TV.
“What are we watching?” I ask.
“You pick. Just use your power wisely. And know that it means you’re staying in this bed tonight.”
“Okay,” I grin at him and hold out my hand for the remote. He shakes his head as he hands it to me, but I don’t miss the small grin that breaks free anyway.
Thirty-Four
Rowan
I drive her to the meet with Steven myself. Hudson and Finn wanted to go. Finn had practically insisted on it, but I refused. If anything goes wrong here, I don’t want them involved. I don’t need either of them going down for this, and someone is going to have to make sure she’s okay if it goes badly. I glance over at Charlotte and her knee bounces in the seat next to me.
