Page 7 of Dare to Dance
I glanced at the Timex watch I’d found in a trashcan. I still had time to run to the drugstore. “I’ll be back. You need medicine.”
She grabbed my wrist. “We don’t have any money, and you can’t get caught stealing again.”
It warmed my heart to know I had someone in my life who cared. I loved her for looking out for me. We were a team. We had been since we met in jail a month before. Norma had been in for prostitution. I’d gotten caught stealing food from a grocery store. I actually considered her family. My mom and dad were both in jail for selling drugs. I silently laughed at how I was on the track to join them if I kept stealing.
“I have a few dollars.” I didn’t have enough for cold medicine. Since our release from jail, we had done everything we could to find jobs. We’d begged for money and waddled through dumpsters for food. She had no one in her life, and she refused to go back to her pimp.
“Ruby.” She sneezed. “We need that money for food.”
I swiped my hand over her short, dirty blond hair. It was literally greasy and dirty, giving her hair color a darker hue. “You need to get better.” She’d been sick on and off for the last week. I was worried that something other than a cold was plaguing her, but with no money, doctors wouldn’t even see her.
Norma sneezed again. “How much money do you have?” She was the practical and cautious one in our friendship.
I dug into my ripped jacket and pulled out change and a dollar bill, courtesy of a nice old man who was the only one to drop money in my cup while I was begging for change earlier that day. “See. It’s plenty to buy one dose of Advil, which will help with your fever.”
She coughed. Her brown eyes were red and watery. “Once I’m better, I’ll resume looking for a job.”
I’d submitted applications at several fast food restaurants in the last month. Those were the only places I could apply. I barely had any skills since I didn’t finish high school. But it was hard to communicate with a potential employer since we couldn’t afford cell phones. “I need to follow up with Burger King tomorrow.”
“I’ll see if my pimp can hire us,” she said through a wheeze.
“No way. I’ll continue to live on the cold streets of Boston before I do that.”
She took my hand. “Ruby, you need to get Raven back. She’s with a strange family. You’re her momma. She needs you.”
I jerked my hand away as tears threatened. “I know, damn it. But I’m not whoring myself. Right now, she’s in a good place. She has a warm bed and food in her belly. I can’t give her that right now.” I cursed my mom for following in my dad’s footsteps. Part of me couldn’t blame her too much. She was only trying to make ends meet for Raven and me. I’d always argued with her that I would find a job while she watched Raven, but she’d said bonding with a child was the most important thing for a mother.
“I’m sorry.” Norma’s teeth chattered. “I didn’t mean to make you upset. But we’ve been on the streets for a month. We, you at least, have got to do something to show social services you have a steady job and an apartment.”
I chewed on the inside of my cheek. “Selling my body isn’t a job social services would approve of.” The social worker had told me to stay out of jail, get steady employment, and find a decent apartment. Then we could talk more about getting Raven back, which I was determined to do.
“I know that.” Norma’s eyes fluttered shut. “But we can make some money to put away for an apartment, and we can continue to look for jobs while we work the streets.”
I angled my head. Maybe she had a fever that was making her delirious. I touched her forehead again. Yep, she was burning up. “Look, get some rest. I’m going to get medicine, and I promise if I need to steal, I won’t get caught.” As much as I needed to do the right thing for my own sake, I couldn’t let my friend suffer. Her cold could turn into pneumonia. Or worse, she could die.
“You don’t need to promise me. You need to promise yourself,” she said, fading in and out of consciousness.
She was sounding more and more like my mother. Norma was only two years older than me, but she came off older than her twenty-two years, maybe because she’d run away from home when she was fifteen, and she’d been surviving on the streets since then.
I covered her with a blanket that was in desperate need of at least ten washings. “Sleep. We’re in a dark, deserted alley.” We’d picked that spot because we hadn’t seen any other homeless people around. Besides, not many people were out in the rain. “No one will bother you. I’ll be right back.” Before she could stop me, I crawled out of the box, flipped my hood over my head, and dashed down the alley onto a main thoroughfare.
I jogged two blocks before the streets came alive with traffic. I passed restaurants where people were gathered, talking and laughing. I couldn’t help but stop to gaze at a couple sitting at a table by the window. The two were holding hands and staring into each other’s eyes. My stomach knotted as sadness sank low in my gut. I had a boyfriend once. I touched my chest, feeling for the pictures inside my jacket pocket that I carried with me at all times. Two were clear reminders of Kross Maxwell. No matter how mad I was at him, he still held a place in my heart. But high school, fun, ballet, Kross, us, had no place in my life. Thinking about the good old days would only depress me or make me angrier. I’d wanted to find him, but with how crazy my life had been with my parents and Raven, there was never a good time. Now that I was homeless, it definitely was not a good time.
Someone bumped into me. “Oh, sorry,” the woman said as she gave me a pitying look before she kept walking.
Instead of spewing swear words at her, I tucked my chin down then started on my quest. Rain poured down and so did my tears. I thought about my little girl who was almost four years old and about how much I wanted to hold her right then. I wanted to squeeze her dimpled cheeks, look into her dark-blue eyes, and feel her thick black hair.What are you doing, Ruby? You’re only torturing yourself. Get your ass in gear and get a job.
I’m trying, I screamed at my subconscious.
I picked up my pace as I traded thoughts of Raven for a plan of where to start looking when the fast food restaurants opened the next day. Burger King had the most promise. The manager was a young guy who seemed to like me by the way he smiled at me. Then I would check in with Taco Bell and a sub shop.
The drugstore sign came into view. I wiped my face with the backs of my fingerless gloves and ducked into Walgreens. The bright lights froze me in place for a second. I hated light. Light meant happy times, but it also reminded me of when I performed on stage at ballet recitals—a memory that would never become a reality again.
I squinted as I scanned the signs above the aisles, spotting the cold medicine near the pharmacy in the back of the store. I hurried down the outside aisle, away from the cashier who was ringing up a customer. I skirted a display of foil pans, boxes of pumpkin bread mix, and other items for Thanksgiving. At one time, I couldn’t wait for Mom’s turkey on Thanksgiving. Now, I hated the holiday that was only weeks away. While everyone stuffed themselves with turkey and said thanks for the things in their lives, I was dumpster diving for fresh scraps.
Once in the aisle with all the cold medicine and pain relievers, I searched up and down for single packets of Advil.
A short man, donning gold-rimmed glasses and a lab coat, walked up with a box of NyQuil in his hand. “Are you looking for something specific?”
