Page 21 of Dare to Live
Baseball was Lacey.
Lacey was baseball.
She should be able to play and have a family. She should live her dream.
I grinned so wide, my lips hurt. “That’s fantastic news. You’re ready for the big leagues.”
“Yeah? You’re really happy for me?”
I lost my grin. “Why would you ask me that?”
She flattened her hands on my chest then rubbed her fingers lightly over my heart tattoos. “You want kids like yesterday.”
“Baby, I want you more,” I said as sure as the rain was still coming down. “We’ll figure things out. I want you to be happy, Lace. I want to see that smile on your face when you get ready to play the game. I want to hear the giddiness in your voice when you talk baseball. Above all else, I love the crap out of you, and I’m with you one hundred percent.” Sure, part of me was sad and gutted that we might not be able to start our family next year like we’d planned. But I would be even more devastated if my wife wasn’t happy.
“I love you so much, it hurts sometimes. I feel selfish that I want to live my dream when yours is to have kids.”
“Nonsense. We’re in this together. Remember? For better or worse. As I said, we’ll figure it out.”
She gave me a weak smile. “I do want kids more than anything. I just want you to know that.”
I dragged a finger down and over one of her breasts. “I know you do. And we’ll have them.”
She sighed. “I asked Tara if she could negotiate a pregnancy addendum into a contract.” She pushed out a shoulder. “I don’t know if she can, but companies give their employees maternity leave. So why not a baseball team?” She sounded like she was trying to convince herself it was a no-brainer.
Hope bloomed in my chest for the first time. Maybe it was that easy. After all, Lacey shouldn’t be penalized in her field just because she wanted to have a kid.
“We should look at renting a house in Portland,” I said.
“You’re full of surprises.” Her voice hitched. “But let’s wait until next year to do that. The season will be over in a couple of months or so. It doesn’t make sense to get a house for that short of a time.”
I pulled her to me.
Whatever fate had in store for us, I was ready. Because I would die for this woman. I would give my soul to the devil just to see her happy.
Chapter 9
Lacey
The All-Star break had come and gone, and after a month of being away from Kade, I was dying to see him. He’d had every intention of returning with me, but I’d wanted him to get a checkup before he packed his bags. He’d had two migraines while I’d been home, and that was one too many for me, especially because the second one had knocked him on his ass during my last day home, which scared the crap out of me. All I kept thinking was that he had another tumor, and this time, what if it wasn’t benign?
I leaned against a brick building outside a quaint Italian restaurant and tapped Kade’s name on my phone.
The city of Portland was hopping with traffic and people coming and going from restaurants and small shops that lined both sides of downtown.
“Are you close?” I asked when the line connected.
“I finally got off the highway.” His husky voice settled the nerves I’d had all day worrying about his doctor’s appointment. “I should be there in about ten minutes.”
“Did the doc say anything?”
“I only had my checkup this morning, Lace. He said he would call as soon as he got the results. Don’t worry.” His tone had a feather softness on the last words. I knew he was trying not to worry me. But that was like telling him not to worry about me.
For the last few weeks, my stomach had been in knots. Hell, it still was. My mind had been consumed with what-ifs. What if he did have a malignant tumor? What if we didn’t have time to have kids?
I’d been thinking I should put my career on hold and do everything in my power to get pregnant. I was selfish. I was the one living my dream, and Kade wasn’t living his.
“Is Tara there yet?” he asked.
