Page 40 of Crazy for You
Part of me understood why Dad was telling me now. Part of me didn’t. Anger simmered deep in my gut about why he hadn’t told me years ago.Then what would you have done?Whether now or before, nothing would have changed.You don’t know that.
What I knew was that I loved the man sitting beside me. I loved Mom, God bless her soul. They had both given me a life that was filled with love and devotion. They had given me everything I could have possibly wanted.
They are your real parents.
Yet I was curious about the two people who didn’t want me.
Nan cleared her throat. “Skyler, I can see the war going on in your head. Keep reading.”
Dad typed on his computer. “If you need a break, I understand. But please know I love you.” Then he sobbed, the sound of his crying echoing in the backyard.
My heart broke into a million pieces. I would never doubt his love for me.
I squeezed my eyes shut, my heart racing so hard I swore I was about to pass out. But I had to be strong for him. I could see how hard it was for him to tell me the mind-blowing news.
I stood and wrapped an arm around him as I pressed my cheek to his. “Dad, you’ll always be the dad I love. You’ll always be my hero. And if I could trade places with you, I would.”
Nan broke into a sob. Dad cried even harder.
I was serious. Sure, my mind was blown, but my feelings for him would never change. He was and always would be my superhero, the man who had taught me how to swing a baseball bat, throw a ball, ride a bike… the list went on.
Nan came over, extending her hand. “Why don’t I read the rest?”
I shuddered, handing her the letter without any protest since I was having a hard time seeing through my tears.
I sat back down as Nan brought her chair closer to Dad and me.
She swallowed before she began reading. “‘Your mom couldn’t have kids, and we tried like heck. But after several miscarriages, we finally decided to call it quits and try the adoption route. The process we went through was a closed adoption, so the records were sealed. The only thing we knew at the time was the girl was young when she’d gotten pregnant.
“‘When I found out I had ALS,’” Nan continued reading, “‘I contacted my lawyer, Mr. Wilson. He’d explained that he could probably get the adoption case reopened since I had a dire medical reason, but that it could take quite a long time. I told him to start the process. If I weren’t here then, he knew to contact you. Recently, he was able to get a judge to grant access to your adoption records. I always planned to tell you, sweetheart. And I’ve been doing some heavy thinking in the last few weeks. I’ve been so distraught over who would take care of you. I want you to be happy. I want you to make the decision about who you would like to be your guardian in the event I pass before you’re eighteen. You mentioned Nan and Georgia’s parents, and now you have the option of your birth mom.’”
“Do you know who my birth mom is? Or where she is?”
Mom and Dad had relocated south from New England eighteen years before. Dad had told me his company had relocated him, but I was curious if they chose to move here because of my birth mother. My pulse sped at the thought that she could be living right under my nose. I mean, the town we lived in wasn’t that big.
Dad glanced at Nan.
“Mr. Wilson hasn’t located her yet. However, if or when you decide you want to learn more, we can contact Mr. Wilson,” Nan said.
Dad typed, “Skyler, I love you so darn much, and your happiness means everything to me. No matter what you decide, I will always be your dad. I’ve loved you from the moment I saw you, and I will go to my grave with all that love in my heart.”
I popped out of my chair and threw myself at the man who had given me everything. “I love you so, so much. I have no idea how I’ll survive without you. But I know one day I’ll see you and Mom again when the three of us are flying with the angels.” The words tumbled free as if I were saying my last words to him. I knew it killed him not to have told me before now, and I couldn’t let him think I would just drop him without a thought because he didn’t father me.
Dad’s shoulders shook as he cried. My heart splintered into a trillion little pieces, and I couldn’t help but sob.
Nan came over and held Dad’s hand. “Randall, rest assured, I will be here for Skyler no matter what she decides.”
I flung myself at Nan, “Thank you.”
“You’re special, Skyler. You’re like a daughter to me.”
Dad and I had been lucky in finding Nan. I hugged her as tightly as I could. “I love you.” If not for her, Dad would probably be in a nursing home, and I would probably be living with my aunt or in foster care. He’d come close to making the decision of a nursing facility. He’d had three caregivers prior to Nan, but they hadn’t been committed to living with us.
She kissed me on the temple. “Right back at you.”
A cool breeze blew, picking up dead leaves from the pear tree that hung over the fence from Colton’s yard.
Nan let go of me. “We should probably get your dad inside. It’s dinner time, and there’s a chill in the air.”
