Page 59 of Hart of Redemption
“How are you holding up with Duke?” she asked.
I shrugged. “I’m trying to stay away from him, if you want the truth. As you heard me tell my dad, Duke might be falling for me.”
Her blue eyes pinned me where I stood. “Are you feeling something for him?”
My stomach recoiled. “It doesn’t matter, Gwen. He and I aren’t going to jet off into the sunset. Regardless of how I feel about Duke, I’ll do my job. That much I promise.”
From her frown, it appeared she didn’t believe me. “Then you need to continue your dance with Duke. How else will you gain intel? You won’t get much behind the bar.”
She had a damn point. “I might be too late for that.”
She fastened her hands on her hips. “Then find a way to do your job, Fallyn. Also, have you forgotten about your brother?”
Frustration was a bitch. So was this assignment. I wanted to scream.
“The last thing you need, Fallyn, is for Bruce to say I told you so.”
I laughed, but it wasn’t a nice sound. “Are you trying to rouse my competitive side?”
“Is it working?”
“Fuck, yeah.” I glanced at the house to be sure Dad wasn’t lurking. “I’m at my wit’s end with Duke. I want to be the same Fallyn I was before I became Joy, but those lines are seriously blurred. Duke made the first move and kissed me. Then he avoided me. Then he kissed me again at Thanksgiving. Last night, he all but begged me to give him one night with me.”
“You obliged?”
I could give her all kinds of excuses why I had, such as I’d given in because he would have fired me otherwise. But that wasn’t the truth. Nor would Duke even do something like that to get his way.
“Let’s just say it was more than I was ready to handle.”
Her lips puckered as if she were about to whistle. “That good?”
“I feel sick to my stomach, knowing I’m lying to Duke, Grace, even his brothers. I feel heartbroken when I see the Harts having a good time together. I won’t ever have that with Jason again. I know everyone warned me about undercover work, and while I’m learning that it’s one of the toughest jobs I’ve done yet, I’m not going to fail. I also haven’t forgotten about my brother. He’s in my thoughts constantly. But most of all, I want to puke that I’m lying to myself. I’m embarrassed that I like Duke. I’m not supposed to like my target.”
She searched my face. “Fallyn Williams, no one will fault you for how you feel. There aren’t many people in this world who can turn their feelings on and off. Humans are not programmed that way.”
“Bruce might be,” I mumbled.
“Fuck Bruce,” she said. “I bet he would react the same as you if Duke was a hot-as-fuck female. I would put my life savings on the fact that Bruce would fuck her brains out too. But if we’re telling the truth, mine is this. I didn’t volunteer for the assignment because?—”
“You have friends who didn’t come out the same.”
“Yes, but one other reason. I know I would’ve fallen for Duke the second he kissed me. Whereas you? You had this determined look that nothing would stop you from taking Duke Hart down and finding info on Jason’s death. That’s why Howard recommended you, but he’s also not naïve. Look, you can have it all, Fallyn, though you might not like the outcome.”
“What you’re saying is I can bring down Duke and the cartel and find answers on Jason, but I’ll have a broken heart in the process?”
“Something like that,” she said. “Love is about sacrifice. Read into that however you like, but I highly encourage you to do your job. The faster we can put this op to bed, the quicker you can come home.” She hugged me. “You got this. I’m here if you need me.” She pressed on her key fob, and thebeep beepresonated in the quiet neighborhood. “We’ll talk soon.”
I watched her dart over to her car, my mind a mass of confusion. I had a lot to unpack after that conversation. Right now, I wanted to curl up by the fire and spend time with my dad and his new dog.
23
DUKE
Iwas watching the crowd from my office window. For a Wednesday night, the club was jam-packed. Our two-for-one specials and half-off ticket prices at the door drew in the midweek crowd. Even the VIP section was filled to the brim.
I roughed a hand over my close-shaven beard as my gaze diverted to Joy behind the bar. She was hustling alongside Matt as they made drinks and served customers. I would go apeshit if someone put a bullet in her. In a way, I was glad I’d left her at the bar that morning and hadn’t looked back. If my enemies found out that she was special to me, Joy would be another pawn to fuck with me.
It had been ten days since she’d rocked my world. I couldn’t stop thinking about her, though. My mind replayed that night with her over and over like a video on repeat. I was torturing myself, and that felt worse than having a gun to my head.
