Page 80 of A Proposition for the Comte
‘The servants are French, too, then?’
‘Only some of them.’
‘Celeste is a very proper lady.’
The laugh took her aback.
‘When she knows you better she may tell you the whole of her story. Everybody has a past, Violet, as much as they might not want to admit it.’
This was so close to what she had just been thinking that she blushed.
‘Yours is attached to the legitimacy that intelligence affords. A slate that can be wiped clean again and again by the interests of state and crown.’
‘There are always shades in such an occupation and the dark hues are more prevalent than you might think.’
‘Was it the case for you?’
‘I have killed men, Violet. Many men. Some in the name of Emperor and country but most because of the less respectable pragmatism of war. If you were to question my morality with those I worked with in Paris, there would be a variety of answers. Some flattering and others not. It would depend on how closely they knew me.’
‘Shayborne, then. What is it he would say?’
‘That he would not want me as an enemy. That ruthlessness often rules me and that the brutal and hard-hearted business of espionage has burnt into my bones as callousness. It still burns,’ he added, ‘make no mistake of that.’
‘Why do you say this?’
‘Because there is never just one answer as to a person’s motives. Once I was a man who believed that trying to do good was enough, but it wasn’t.’
‘What changed you?’
‘I told you of Veronique.’ He waited till she nodded. ‘But mostly I think it was the death of my mother. She was killed by a faction that believed the de Beaumont aristocrats were greedy sycophants who deserved a lesson. After she died I delivered them a stronger message back and it went on from there. A moment of change. A decision that led to others. All of life is like that perhaps, an action, a reaction and then a consequence. The consequence of standing up for what you believe in.’
‘And if you don’t? If you didn’t?’
‘Then find the point in your past that you did. It is surprising on reflection how many times the downfall is unchangeable and then all you can do is live with it, the shame and the loss, and hope that you have done enough for it to never happen again.’
‘Is it something you might tell others...this thing that changes you? Is that a necessary thing, do you think, to recover?’
‘No.’ He said the word almost without thought, strong and certain. ‘It is enough for you to know it and acknowledge the debt.’
Tears came into her eyes at the gift of his words and his finger softly wiped them away as they fell.
‘Tomorrow is a new day to vanquish ghosts. Count on that.’
She saw his smile and the dash of humour in his eyes and was grateful. He knew enough of shadows to dispel them before they overcame you and made you weep for all that was gone. She had never met a man before who had understood that.
The Christmas marzipan ball he popped into her mouth was delicious.
The letter came the next day ordering Aurelian to present himself in London. He was to bring Lady Addington with him.
The signature was that of Douglas Cummings and Lian knew enough of legal summons to also know it could not be ignored. But he had other plans entirely and the rider who had brought the missive had not placed it in his hands personally.
He did not want to take Violet to London where she would be in more danger. Cummings and Antoinette Herbert were his prime suspects but he was certain there were others, as well, and he needed to find out who else was there alongside them.
When he told Violet of his plans, her reaction was not at all the one he imagined.
‘I want to go with you, Aurelian. I won’t stay here by myself so if you do not agree to take me I will come anyway.’
‘You’ve been hurt once by these people and Compton Park is a safe haven. If you would prefer, you could stay with Shay and Celeste at Luxford.’
